(Closed) Getting your man down the aisle…

posted 5 years ago in Proposals
Post # 2
Member
1354 posts
Bumble bee

Mmmmmm,….. Honestly I didn’t have to push my hubby to propose or plan the wedding. He never showed any hesitation, really. Perhaps, once you’re engaged officially, give it a little time to enjoy that initial phase, then slowly start bringing up the planning. Sounds like he’s just slow about these things. Hopefully he’ll surprise you and be more on board with the planning than you think. Honestly I don’t know a lot of men who are really into all the details of the wedding anyways, as long as you’re confident he wants to marry you, it’s ok to take the lead sometimes! Good luck! Post your ring when you get it!!

Post # 3
Member
1334 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

I didn’t have to “put my foot down” for an engagement. But wedding planning with my Fiance is annoying.

He says he doesn’t care, so I show him what I decided on and suddenly he does care and hates it.

This happened so many times that now the agreement is he doesn’t hear about it, and I just take his money And deal with the whole thing. He will just show up on the day! 

Oh well. At least I know it will be perfectly to my liking! 

Post # 4
Member
214 posts
Helper bee

Mine wanted to propose but he is bad with money. Our situation also made it difficult because he paid for everything for me becauase legally i wasnt allowed to work in the states but he wanted me there for as long as i could stay as a visitor each time. he kept saying he was saving money because he wants to get me a ring. I decided it was too much pressure and he didnt know anything about jewellry at all. I really wanted to avoid the whole solitaire round in a gold band thing (not that there is anything wrong with that, its just not me… Its very traditional). I decided to research (something he finds intimidating) to find alternatives and was very heavily involved in the whole designing the ring. i do feel like it takes away the romance and i feel like i “put my foot down” in the sense that I moved up the ring buying time table. Honestly, he would have rushed it, bought something i didnt like, just to avoid legally marrying me (for my visa) before proposing. anyway, at the end of the day i am happy for him waiting as long as he did and me researching bc what i thought i liked, i didnt, what i thought i didnt like, i love. And im so happy we found a great affordable alternative. Its a win-win all around, but he hasnt proposed yet and that i told him is all on him 😛

Post # 5
Member
36 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2016

I understand 100% … This is my exact story lol. However, im finding the closer he gets to actually giving me the ring (which is currently locked up and driving me crazy because i want to see it) the more he lightens up about the idea. I don’t like feeling as if ive forced him into this commitment but I do tell him a lot that if he doesn’t want to marry me at all then its something we need to talk about and I dont want him to feel pressured, and he tells me not to worry and he loves me and wants to be with me forever (i’m still worried).

He has recently started talking to me about wedding plans instead of shrugging it off completely but he still gets slightly annoyed if I talk about it for too long or too often. He’s definitly warming up to it though, my biggest fear is he feels pressured and hes not talking to me about it. I love him more then anything and if he’s not ready to make the commitment, or would rather elope, i’d work through it with him.

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