Post # 1
This isn’t a debate, after speaking to our family & friends, they really thought this was an awesome and stress free idea!! So I was just wondering how popular it is where you are/in your circle?? And vote how you feel about them, if you want 🙂
Post # 3
@LRCWedding: I am not a fan of them. If it wasn’t a close friend, I would consider not going, or maybe doing a group gift with a bunch of people.
If I’m going to a shower, I really prefer a registry. A themed party (like a recipe and stuff to make it with) is also helpful if there is no registry.
What is done at a shower when it’s all gift cards/cash? Do you open the cards in front of everyone?
Post # 4
I feel eh about it. Its never something that is done in my circle and I imagine it would be frowned upon. I think where I’m from, any kind of “registry” where people are asking for money of any type (gift cards, honeyfunds…whatever) is frowned upon (although lots of people do give gifts of money for weddings). I told my mom I knew someone with a honeyfund and she cringed and walked away. I think thats the general feeling around here. If I was ever invited to a shower like this, I would still give a gift – probably a gift card, I wouldnt give cash for a shower (I always give a gift when I’m invited to a shower, wedding, etc. whether I go or not…I think its rude, generally speaking, not to), but not sure if I would go.
Post # 5
I had my shower last weekend and I would say that it was pretty much 50/50 gifts and cash/gift cards. I opened the gifts but left the rest of the cards.
Post # 6
I don’t like them and it’s not something done in my circle. To me, a money shower or Honeymoon shower = fundraiser since showers are supposed to be for showering the bride with gifts. If it were a good friend or family memeber, I would still go, but I’d get them a tangible gift.
Post # 7
I believe that a bridal shower is about family members and friends of the bride selecting special gifts that they not only believe the bride will enjoy but also that they, personally, would like to give to her. In other words, gift-giving, to me, is not only about the recipient, but also about the giver of the gift. It should always be more about the recipient (i.e., Aunt Wilhelmina should not choose a Victorian-themed table doily in her own favorite color simply because she loves it, when the bride loves very modern design and hates dusty rose); however, it’s very nice when the giver of the gift takes the time to consider the honoree and her relationship to her and selects something that she thinks the bride will enjoy but also will help the bride to remember fondly the person who is giving her the gift.
Before bridal registries existed, I always tried to take time to consider the person for whom I was buying a gift, and I tried to choose something that would be meaningful to that special person in my life and that would provide a point of connection from me to her. Since the advent of bridal registries, I always try to select something for which the bride has registered; however, I try to find something on the registry that I like, too, so that I can share with the bride my appreciation for that item that I am selecting for her. (In other words, I may find the wall hanging for which she has registered to be not at all attractive. However, I may absolutely LOVE the placemats and napkins she chose.)
To me, showers where those hosting the event tell guests that they should give gift cards from a particular list of stores, or cash, essentially remove this point of connection from the gift-giving process. It makes the transaction very one-sided, instead of the more relationship-driven process that I believe gift-giving was intended to be.
All of that said, I did, at least once, give a gift card at a shower, because it was something that I chose to do and felt it was very appropriate to that particular situation and that particular bride as well as my limited points of connection with her. (It was a gift card to her favorite salon, one where she had referred me when I had just moved into the area. As I only knew her casually, I felt it was both appropriate to our connection and very useful to her.)
Post # 8
Not at all popular in my circle. Honestly, I think if I did it, no one would come because my family would find it rude. If your family/friends are onboard, I think that’s great, but since you’re asking about my particular circumstances, I’d say no for me!
Post # 9
@AB Bride: Well my best friend had one of these showers in February and a like 3 people out of 20 gave her a gift. It was like really special items from her mom & aunt. But she just talked to everyone, played games, ate, and that was about it. She did take the cards home and open it with her Fiance.