Post # 1
So… FMIL got married 4 years ago. Her and her husband started dating 2 years after FI and I. He didn’t help raise FI, as he was 20 when they got together. It’s also kind of odd because he is only 12 years older than FI. So not really a fatherly figure at all. FMIL wants us to treat him like a dad though.. as in, go to father’s day dinners and what not. I’m trying to plan for gifts for the parents and I’m not really sure what to get FMIL’s husband. Thoughts??
Post # 2
can you do a joint gift, like a gift card to their favorite restaurant or play tickets, and then give fmil something small in addition? or you could do the joint gift and write her a nice card from the 2 of you.
Post # 3
Thanks! That might work.. in looking for gifts I just keep coming across sappy dad gifts which don’t really apply to him.
Post # 4
Stephanie8904: Yeah for my dad’s girlfriend (I met her at 19) I go the joint gift, this year it’s gold class (fancy cinema in aus) tickets.
Post # 5
Stephanie8904: Your FMIL is being ridiculous. This guy is not your FI’s dad so he doesn’t get anything on fathers’ day.
Are your and his biological dads in the picture? For us, fathers’ day is about the dads, not my mother’s husband. I’d tell her no, we can’t make it to the fathers’ day dinner, we are seeing our dads.
If you mean wedding gifts, I don’t see why he gets a gift. You don’t get a gift for being the spouse of someone in the wedding party. It’s like getting a gift for the MOH’s husband. That said, you could avoid drama by getting them a combined gift.
Post # 6
aussiemum1248: For the purpose of this post, yes I meant wedding gifts. I should have been more clear in that.
But, she does ask us to contribute to father day gifts or to get him a card… he has no actual children. FI’s younger sister lived with him for a couple of years when her dad died and she moved back to our state to be with her mom. We are also expected to get him Christmas gifts.. birthday..etc. My dad is in the picture. We see him all the time. FI’s biological dad is around. He actually just moved into our town last year. But we barely hear from him. He was an absent parent who he says was “kept from his son” and now expects FI to build their relationship since contacting him 7 years ago. So we don’t get him gifts. I have sent him cards every once in a while. Unfortunately the man that FI sees as his dad was his sister’s father who passed away early in our relationship.