Post # 1
Hey! I’m not getting married yet but this is just something that’s been bugging me because I can’t think of a better way to phrase it. I have read on an invite
“*insert registry info here* However it’s not your presents that matter to us but your presence”.
I think this is HORRIBLY cheesey but what is a better way to say the same thing without it sounding icky? Just a way to give the registry info but also say no pressure and it doesn’t matter. Any thoughts?
Post # 3
Etiquette guidelines are that you should never put anything about gifts or registry information on your invitation. If you have a website, post it on there, or rely on word of mouth being spread from your parents, etc.
Now, even though you shouldn’t be doing it, I have gotten a lot of invites with it on there, most were listed on the back of the invite or on a seperate card in the envelope.
Post # 4
Where I’m from, everyone just sticks the business card from the store with the registry info into the invitation, and no one gets offended. I’ve ever seen it printed right on the invitation, usually with the simple wording of: John and Jane are registered at Macy’s, Bed, Bath and Beyond, and Sears.
Post # 5
Around here from what I have seen, and what we did, is there is a little card included in the invite that says it. Thus far no one has seemed too offended by it.
Post # 6
Red Dino is correct. It is not proper etiquette to include registry information in an invitation. You may, however, direct your guests to a wedding website for more wedding details, and you may include a link to your registry on the website for those who are interested in reviewing that information.
Post # 7
That’s not what I am asking at all. This is not a question about whether or not it is impolite to mention gifts in invitations. Sorry if my question was not clear. I asked what is another way of saying (roughly) “it’s your presence that matters to us not your presents” but in a non-cheesey way.
Post # 8
I felt the same way so I did not bother to do the whole gift registry thing.
If gifts are not as important as their presence then simply dont include gift registry information in the invite and find somewhere to put in a phrase that says something like “your presence would be the greates gift.”
Post # 9
We are including a card with our invites that directs people to our wedding website, which lists our registry. I don’t want to flat out ask for gifts…but some people do.
Post # 10
Brides are supposed to want your presence and not the present. Writing it in the invite is overkill. But whether it’s written there or not, I couldn’t show up to a wedding empty handed, that too is rude.
Post # 11
@VickyAurea: It’s impolite to talk about gifts at all on an invitation. That’s why etiquette says that you aren’t supposed to put registry info in the invitation. The same applies to the wording that you suggest. I see how you’re trying to say something in a polite way, but the most polite thing to do would be to not mention gifts at all.
Post # 12
i think that’s rude! youre not supposed to mention gifts ever on the invite. if she prefers someone’s attendance only then dont include a registry enclosure.
Post # 13
It’s not strict ettiquette but it is practical.
As much as I’d just like to direct people to our website, we are inviting a lot of older family members who aren’t super tech savvy. I’m also trying to find an alternative to the whole ‘your presence not your presents’ thing.
Any suggestions from people other than ‘it’s rude’?
Post # 14
I have NEVER seen this on an invite before and, to be totally honest, I would think it very rude to put something on the invite. Most of us brides want gifts. In fact, most of us want cash gifts, BUT to put it on the invite makes it seem like a solicitation. It’s a little too in your face