(Closed) Gifting advice needed – what to give?

posted 5 years ago in Gifts and Registries
  • poll: What to gift as ceremony only guests?
    Cash - how much? : (3 votes)
    12 %
    physical gift off the registry : (10 votes)
    40 %
    flowers / plant or some other superficial gift with a nice card : (1 votes)
    4 %
    gift card for a restaurant in the city : (11 votes)
    44 %
    something else, all of these are terrible : (0 votes)
  • Post # 3
    9 posts
    • Wedding: November 2014

    @slicey19:  I honestly like the idea of a gc to a yummy place for dinner. That is rather different from what I gather. I mean most get either cash or a gift off of their registries, so maybe one night they don’t feel like cooking dinner, they can use the gc. I think it is sufficient enough for having to drive 3 hours each way and only attending the ceremony and cocktail hour. Had you been invited to the reception too, I’d say cash or registry gift, but the gc should be fine.

    Post # 4
    4495 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    Honestly, unless I was actually friends with the person I would never drive 3 hours just for a ceremony & cocktail hour. But I guess if I did I would just give them a gift card to a restaurant. I think flowers are kind of a strange wedding gift – since there will likely be flowers at the wedding itself and it just seems like a waste of money. I think a gift card would suffice.

    Post # 5
    7561 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: January 2013

    I probably wouldn’t drive that far for a former coworker. 

    However, if you and your Darling Husband are going I would probably get a $30-$50 gift off their registry or some cash. 

    Post # 6
    960 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    @AlwaysSunny:  +1

     @adoc86:  +1

    Cash or a resturant gift card for $30-50


    But if there was a chance to RSVP no, I would do that as thats seriously far for such a short period of time…


    Post # 7
    3572 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2011

    I actually think it’s pretty rude to invite some people to a cocktail hour when it’s clear you’re not “good enough” for their dinner list. I’d probably send them something on the cheaper end of their registry and RSVP regretts. 

    Post # 8
    5976 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: April 2013

    I’d RSVP no and send them a modest gift card.  I love the dinner idea (or some other “date” kind of gift card).  I’d go with $30-40 and make sure it’s to somewhere where that’s an approriate amount.  

    Post # 9
    4687 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: June 2013 - Upstate NY

    I have never, ever heard of inviting someone to only part of a wedding. People just don’t do that up here. Is that typical?

    Post # 10
    1902 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    I know it’s normal in some places to invite people to only the ceremony, then have the reception for closer friends and family, but I personally think it’s pretty dodgy to invite someone who lives far away for just a ceremony and cocktail hour.

    I probably wouldn’t even worry about going to the wedding or, if I did, I would just give a relatively small gift off the registry.

    Still, at least you knew about this in advance! My husband and I were invited to one of his friend’s weddings a few years ago, and we found out at the ceremony that we weren’t invited to the reception. We had a 7 hour round trip to get there, two nights in the hotel, $100 on a gift, just to sit through their ceremony and get a sausage roll afterwards. We were pretty peeved off.

    Post # 11
    739 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    I wouldn’t even put much thought or effort into deciding on a restaurant for a GC, so I would just pick something boring off the registry and reply that you cannot attend. It’s in poor taste to invite someone to only part of the wedding, especially since they must know you’d be driving a distance to attend. I don’t think I’d be very happy if I were you!

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