Post # 1
Hi everyone! I have a quick question: do I have to get my Future Mother-In-Law a gift? The ONLY thing she is doing for the wedding is paying for the rehearsal dinner(I planned the whole thing!). She is it coming OR helping with my shower or ANYTHING wedding related. Some input would’ve much appreciated!!!
Post # 3
Are your parents getting gifts? I’d give her whatever you’re giving the other parents.
Post # 4
paying for the rehearsal dinner might actually be a lot – i guess it depends on the size of your dinner. if you’re getting a gift her based on how much effort she put into facilitating the wedding, then maybe. you could get her a smaller gift perhaps just to mark the occassion and show her that you are happy about joining their family?
Post # 5
So, this may sound really harsh…BUT my Future Mother-In-Law has done NOTHING for my wedding except write the check for the rehearsal dinner, so I can definitely NOT give her what I’m giving my mom–who is paying for our ENTIRE wedding. My Future Mother-In-Law isn’t even coming to my shower OR the aufruf (pronounced uff-ruff), which is a ceremony done for the groom the Friday before the wedding. (Can you tell I’m bitter). I don’t even want to get started on all the “drama”. Here’s a little insight: my FH and I got engaged on Sept 18, 2011. On Sept 20, she called my mom, said, “Congratulations!” and as my mom began to talk to her about wedding stuff she said, “Yea, we won’t be coming to any of that ‘stuff.'” She AND my Future Sister-In-Law (who is a bridesmaid and is also not participating in ANY of the bridal festivities [shower, bachelorette, favors, etc.], and she are just too busy to come up. I think I’ll leave it up to my FH. If HE wants to get her a gift, he can pay for it. I know he’ll probably get her something…
I like the idea of something to commemorate the day, although I’m not sure she’ll even appreciate it. I printed up some great pics of my FH and me and when I gave them to here (there were like 6) she said to me, “Oh I don’t want all these. I only need one for the frame I have.”
Thanks for the advice girls
Post # 6
I always saw the presents to the parents as a thank you for raising you, being part of your lives, etc rather than a thank you for paying for the wedding. With that point of view, I’ll be giving each set of parents the same gift. They are both special to Fiance and I.
Post # 7
i like what bichon frise said. that seems like a good neutral ground – get your parents a present to say thank you for all you did to get me to this point … and if you like, you can alter her suggestion, and just each get your own parents something to say thank you for that =)
side note, her comment about the pictures is really awkward
Post # 8
She sounds..difficult. WIth that being said, you wanna start out your marriage on a good note so I would DEFINITELY get her a gift. It sucks now but you will be dealing with this woman for a while so I recommend making the effort. Good luck to you.
Post # 9
I would get them the same gift and then privately give your parents something extra special as a thank you for paying for your entire wedding. I also think that paying for a rehearsal dinner is great regardless of what is expected, there are so many brides getting very little help or no help.
Post # 10
We’re making the photobooks for both sets of parents, and also probably giving them a gift card for dinner out at the Rehearsal Dinner.