Post # 1
ok, i totally know that gifts are NOT requirements at weddings, and i hope that people don’t think i’m being greedy…i’m asking merely a question about customs. so, here goes…
we invited my two bosses, a VP and the CEO, and their spouses to our wedding, about three weeks ago. i’m pretty close with both of them as far as office relationships go, because our company is small and just because they’re great people, we get along well and work on projects closely. we didn’t get a gift, or even a card from either of them…is that weird? we got really thoughtful cards and generous gifts from my two other co-workers we invited…it just seems…strange…
Post # 3
You don’t sound greedy at all! It’s a very fair question.
Did they attend the wedding? I am the type of person to always bring a gift to the wedding or send it before. I have forgotten a few times and sent something later with a note. They just may be sending you a gift afterwards. I know we received a lot when we got back from the honeymoon and are still getting a few.
Post # 4
Yes, I actually do think that’s a bit strange. But, you are right – there is no requirement that one should give you a gift – however, it’s become so commonplace, that it’s odd when there isn’t one… even more so because of your work relationship.
Not that you asked, but when doing thank you notes, I’d still send them on and thank them for being there….
Post # 5
- Wedding: March 2010 - Calamigos Ranch
That’s totally strange. You are not being greedy; they are being borderline-rude (whether you “have” to give a gift or not). I wouldn’t send them a thank you note just for showing up; their meal was their thank you. But that’s just me.
Post # 6
It’s almost expected to receive some sort of gift/card when people attend weddings. I’d never go to one without bringing something. Did you register? Maybe they ordered the item and you never received it? Did any other coworkers give you guys a gift? Maybe ask them on the sly if they know anything about the VP & CEO and if they heard anything about them gifting or not. The worst thing would be that they did get you a gift and sent it, but you never received it.
Post # 7
I dont think you are being greedy – I know etiquette says dont expect a gift but to be honest if people do attend my wedding, I expect a gift or at least a card. Maybe they didnt have time to get one before the wedding, I got several gifts weeks after the wedding and one just a week ago and our wedding was June 20th. Did they go to the wedding?
Post # 8
oh thanks for your responses. i’m glad i didn’t come across as gift-hungry 🙂 yes, they both attended the wedding with their spouses, and we were totally glad that they came! i guess they both did have to travel about an hour or so to get there, so maybe that was their thinking? who knows, maybe we will get something in the mail or something. if not, oh well 🙂 it’s just so weird because i thought they would have said something about it (“we forgot your card at the wedding! it’s in the mail!”) since i talk to them like 22 times a day!
oh, and we did register, but everything that seems to have been purchased (at least according to the website), we’ve received. i’ll bet we get something in a few weeks!
thanks for letting me know i’m not crazy for thinking it’s a little weird!
Post # 9
I don’t think you’re being greedy, I would have wondered about that, too. You could always write a thank you note to them and thank them for attending the wedding. If I received a note that didn’t mention my gift specifically, I’d check back in with the bride to see if she had received it.