(Closed) Gigantic guest list

posted 8 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
1315 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Wow poor you. I kinda know how you feel – the family pages of the guest lists are SOOO much longer than the friends ones! Made me feel like Nora no mates, until I realised that it’s just I don’t feel the need to invite everyone I’ve ever met lol !!

It sounds like your plans are reasonably flexible, can you maybe send your invites out kinda early, with a good early RSVP date, to help it work?

Post # 4
Hostess
18643 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Are you the ones paying?  If so, you have the right to cut down the guest list to what you can afford.  I really don’t think that you are going to have 200 not attend the wedding, that’s a huge amount of people that wouldn’t come.

Post # 5
Member
4485 posts
Honey bee

There is no way to even guess until you start receiving replies back and have the answers in your hand. Your know your guests better than anyone here does.

While it’s too late at this point, the first thing to do when putting the guest list together is decide how many people you can afford to host and don’t go over it. Be firm on your guestlist and don’t let anyone pressure you into inviting strangers who don’t care about you, or any other decision you don’t agree with. It’s your wedding, not your parents’ or anyone else’s for that matter. If you do something that you don’t agree with or want to do, then you will have regrets. Weddings are expensive and each person does add up, and not everyone wants to share their day with folks they don’t know who don’t support their relationship.

Post # 7
Member
326 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

The general “rule of thumb” is about a 20% decline rate…but that is also depending upon how many of your guests are from out of town.  We found that many of the Out of Town guests we invited decided to actually come to the wedding because it was a good excuse to visit family/friends/etc.  I think more local people than Out of Town declined ours…but just so you get an idea we invited 365 guests and 280 RSVP’d “yes.”  That is just over 20% for the decline rate. 

I know many people feel that if they are the ones paying, they get to decide the guest list..but my fiance and I felt that no matter what the financial situation, this day was about our families too.  Both sets of parents should be allowed a guest list, as well as our own.  I mean, if the tables were turned and your parents were paying, you would want them to allow you and your Fiance a guest list, right? 

Anywho, back to the topic at hand, you won’t really know until the RSVP’s start rolling in, because often what we “assume” will happen, is the complete opposite.

Post # 8
Member
990 posts
Busy bee

hmmm…I would have to go with No on this one. Alot of people won’t come, that is true, however out of 330 people, I do believe less than 200 will not RSVP. And dont forget, some people who didnt RSVP will show up anyway. Be careful, but I wish you luck…

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