(Closed) Girl is obsessed with my FI and me…HELP!

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
  • poll: What should I do about this girl?

    Disinvite her from the wedding and end the friendship

    Confront her and try to talk to her about it, make decision about wedding invite after that

    Don't confront her, don't disinvite her...just ignore it

    Other (please explain below)

  • Post # 47
    Member
    2167 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    View original reply
    @CandieC88:  Ya! Tell her she is no longer invited due to budget or venue issues. She may be offended and automatically assume its a personal thing…in which case her assumption would be CORRECT. And then hopefully she catches on further once you create major, Grand Canyon size distance between your life and hers. 

    Post # 48
    Member
    739 posts
    Busy bee

    I didn’t read all the replies but this is what I would do in your shoes. I would contact the roommates and talk to them about the situation. Let them know you are ending the friendship with her and why. Then I would send the follwing letter to her. Certified mail so you know she got it. Or just walk up and hand it to her, say, “I think you know why it has to be this way” Then walk away.

     

    Dear CrazyPants,

    Fiance and I both find your behaviour very inappropriate and no longer feel you are an asset to our lives. Though the flirting with Fiance may have seemed harmless it has made us both uncomfortable and you were oblivious to the ques to back off. Punching Fiance in the face was our last straw. We are moving on with our lives and feel you are a negative weight we must get rid of before we take this next step. Please consider this and do not show up at our wedding, you will be escorted off the property if you do. If you decide to go against our wishes and try to contact either of us we will be forced to press assault charges against you as well as a restraining order. We do not wish you ill harm and hope you go on to have a happy fulfilled life. We just no longer want to be a party of it.

    Best,

    CandieC88

     

    Make sure to keep a copy for yourselves so if you were to get in a situation you would have proof you tried to break it off cordially.

    Post # 49
    Member
    2440 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    View original reply
    @PizzutiStudios:  That feels stone cold (like, moeso than just being a bitch to her face) but I think it’s actually a good idea. It’s a bit extreme, but it really might be the best way to go about it (just in case crazy gets crazier)

    Post # 50
    Member
    6256 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: March 2014

    She sounds like she is showing symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder.

    That said, that’s not your problem, especially if she doesn’t realize she has issues and refuses to get treated for them.

    If she is being violent to you, she does not belong at your wedding. Plus, do you want to risk her standing up during the “does anyone object” part?!

    Post # 51
    Member
    1009 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    @CandieC88: Um……she punched your Fiance, and is still allowed to be around y’all? Hell no. And her lack of socially acceptable behavior is not a good enough reason to take pity on her and be her friend. Honestly, if she goes to the wedding, what is she going to do? Walk down the aisle after you and squish herself between the bride and groom like a clingy 3 year old? Repeat the vows after you do? Speak, lest she forever have to hold her peace? She’s a ticking time bomb, and weddings are NOT the place to go off in. Good luck in dealing with her. Just stop hanging out with her, if she tries to invite herself, stop her with a “No. This is xxx and xxx and I time ONLY.”

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