Girlfriend unhappy with engagement ring

posted 1 year ago in Engagement
Post # 91
Member
4784 posts
Honey bee

disbeeprincess :  I’d much rather have a natural stone than a lab created one, but that doesn’t make me strange. But judging people’s preferences based on your own is what’s strange.

Post # 92
Member
336 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2019 - City, State

sunburn :  ok, that’s good to know

xD how funny, i wasn’t trying to start an argument by enjoying moissanite. 

talking about how it’s “strange” (or interesting?) that we prize things by scarcity isn’t a personal remark … 

Post # 93
Member
870 posts
Busy bee

disbeeprincess :  I think it’s totally an other people thing. Like a lay person with no interest in jewelry at all knows what a sapphire and knows that it’s a nice, expensive, high quality item. A lay-person might not know about moissanite, so there might just be more education involved, which not everyone is dying to do

Post # 94
Member
336 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2019 - City, State

AnonBee2019 :  ah that makes sense. I guess because it looks so sparkly and close to diamond, it might get tiresome explaining over and over. 

Post # 95
Member
3929 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 2019 - City, State

Awe, I’m sorry your ring choice didn’t go over well OP. I think you put a lot of time and effort into choosing the right ring and that’s lovely. What’s even better is that you and your new Fiance can communicate honestly with each other. Her being able to tell you she’s unhappy with it is huge. It may suck to hear, but now you can work together on a solution. Which is exactly what you should do. I would let her choose a different center stone (or new ring altogether). The important thing is to not take this personally. Despite our best intentions, sometimes we’re just not perfect! It doesn’t mean she doesn’t think the absolute world of you. Maybe you could reset the center stone into a necklace for her for valentines day! Congratulations on your engagement and best of luck in finding something you both love!

Post # 96
Member
4784 posts
Honey bee

disbeeprincess :  I may have overreacted and I apologize. I just get tired of the double standard that exists here where it’s perfectly ok to disparage diamonds while praising moissy to the skies. If someone tried the same thing in reverse, there would be hell to pay. You can’t even call moissy a simulant (which is what the largest manufacturer called it) or you’ll have an angry horde descend. 

 

 

Post # 97
Member
336 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2019 - City, State

sunburn :  aw thank you,

I don’t think you overreacted – I am new, and I’m seeing that there are things here I don’t have the whole story about. I noticed that in another thread where I was like “ack why are people jumping on this woman?” And then I did some digging and oh, myyyyyyy the sh*t show, I didn’t know how lonnnng people had burned energy trying to help. 

I can’t expect to blunder around a new community and not accidentally step on some toes. No hurt feelings here 🙂 just know I’m a bull in a china shop at this point, but I mean well.

 I’ll learn what the culture is here, in time. In the meantime – I’m just enjoying sparkly rings ✨✨✨✨✨

Post # 98
Member
336 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2019 - City, State

 

sunburn :  and I mean not to be rude but… it is a simulant, isn’t it. It’s created. Annnnd I probably just stomped my Godzilla feet on an entire city just now, so I’ll see myself out.   🤣eh heh heh. 

I’m not trying to be a pill. I’m just made that way 

Post # 100
Member
135 posts
Blushing bee

disbeeprincess :  it’s a simulant if you’re trying to pass it as a diamond (simulating diamond), which has nothing to do with it being lab made (mined white sapphire can be a simulant, and lab diamonds are not simulants because they’re actual diamonds). I think calling moissanite a simulant can be insulting, though, because many people aren’t trying to pass moissanite off as diamond. They think it’s beautiful in its own right as a unique gem.

Post # 101
Member
336 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2019 - City, State

adastra :  I understand. I was being a bit silly, and probably shouldn’t have. The story of moissanite fascinates me-

apologies if I offended. I do realize tone can’t be read in text, so I need to be less flippant here. 

(I covet moissanite now that I know about it, so I’m certainly not snubbing it either. beautiful sparklies!) 

Post # 103
Member
336 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2019 - City, State

dundee :  ah. that makes sense, just constantly explaining would start to feel sad (at least to me) and if she didn’t say anything, she’d feel like she was being untruthful. 
I’m sorry 🙁 hope you find a solution that has you both happy. 

Post # 104
Member
20 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2010 - Waygetter Electronics

I have a Moissanite ring, and I can totally ‘own’ it all the way; I love Moissanite for what it is in, and of itself.  I understand not everybody can, or wants to do that.  A 5ct Moissanite would be amazing to me, and I understand that not everyone feels that way.  

Post # 105
Member
416 posts
Helper bee

dundee :  So what does your girlfriend want to do? If she’s set on a diamond she is going to have to sacrifice finger coverage unless she’s open to a double halo maybe. Salt and pepper diamonds are pretty affordable in large sizes if she’s open to a colored stone. 

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