- 4 years ago
- Wedding: December 2016
My girlfriend and I have five dogs. Don’t get me started, lol. I had three and she had two when we got together, and we’re both such animal lovers that we can’t part with any of them. They are very well taken care of and adored.
She has always crated her silky terrier and her morkie, even up to 12 hours a day while she was working and going to the gym after work. This, I understand, was not good and I have made sure that they aren’t crated that long anymore. Two of my beagles haven’t been kenneled since they were one-year-old unless a maintenance person is coming over or something like that where they need to be out of the way. They have been potty trained and chew trained from a very young age. They are well-behaved in those departments. However, my youngest rescue beagle is still working out some potty training and chew training issues, and so we kennel him as well as her dogs.
So we kennel my young beagle and her two during the day. As I said, her pups have always been kenneled, but for some reason lately, she keeps getting very upset that they are kenneled despite the fact that she has always done so over the past eight years. She wants to let them out during the day like my other two beagles are. The problem is: We tried for several months with no success because they will potty even after being left out of the kennel for only a couple of hours. They just won’t hold it. And the beagle will destroy whatever he can get his paws on. Even when I was going home over lunch to let them out (after three hours of them holding it), I would come home to poop and pee all over the place and couch cushions torn up, etc. And I would make sure they pottied before I went to work.
I can’t go home over lunch to let them out anymore, and that upsets her greatly. She was very irritated with me about it. We now live in a different town, and it would take me 20 minutes to drive home and 20 minutes to drive back to work over an hour lunch period, with me trying to also let the dogs out, eat something quickly, and kennel them back up in the little time left over. I tried it a few times and was late, so I made the decision that it just isn’t feasible for me unless I am going to have a long day at work that absolutely necessitates it. She also can’t do it because she only has 30 minutes for lunch. She never used to let her dogs out over lunch, so I’m not sure why I’m the bad guy here.
I’m not sure what to do. She keeps getting very upset about the dogs being crated while we work, but I don’t see what other choice we have. We can’t afford doggy daycare for three dogs, though she keeps suggesting it like we can. She is in school and struggles to make ends meet as is. I am paying a larger portion of the mortgage and bills and can’t afford the added cost.
I feel like we love the dogs, we spoil them rotten (you don’t want to know how much we spend on toys and treats a month), and we are walking them in the morning and after work. We go straight home most days and spend all evening with them. We spend our weekends with them. I could see doggy daycare as a treat a couple of times a month, but other than that, I’m not sure what she’s expecting or what to tell her. If they could maintain potty training, I’d love to let them have the run of the house. The dogs are just not potty trained, and I don’t think her 4-year-old silky and her 8-year-old morkie will ever be. The beagle is a little over a year old and has made a lot of progress in that department, but still destroys things. We also used to let them sleep with us, but they wouldn’t hold it overnight either. We both agreed out of the frustration of cleaning pee/poop up in the morning, over lunch, and in the evening that it was time to crate them again, but it’s like she’s forgetting why we made that mutual decision.
I’m not sure what to tell her at this point or what to try. This is becoming a frequent argument, with her often saying it isn’t fair that two of my dogs aren’t crated all day while the other three dogs in the house are crated. I’ve offered to get kennels and crate those two more, but that suggestion doesn’t seem to work either. At the same time, I don’t feel like the two potty trained beagles need to be put back into a crate that they aren’t used to anymore just because the other three are not potty trained yet. I also honestly think her two little dogs like their kennel (it’s what they’ve always known) and that she doesn’t understand that they will be upset that she’s leaving whether they are crated or left to roam the house. They would actually bite and yip at us (aggressively) when we left the house while they weren’t crated. In the kennel, they lie down and relax.
Suggestions? We don’t have family or friends nearby that could watch them for us, unfortunately. Doggy daycare is too expensive for three dogs. I have always felt like we are doing a great job making things work with what we have and that we treat the dogs extremely well, but this complaint keeps rearing its ugly head.
Advice, counsel, suggestions appreciated.. thanks so much.