(Closed) Going crazy waiting!!!

posted 7 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
115 posts
Blushing bee

@bunny85:  

Welcome!

You most definitely are not alone. I too am going on 4 years this Spring and know exactly how you feel. My SO also had some financial concerns early into the relationship, so I have been waiting for awhile for things to fall more into place for him so he feels ready to commit legally. I think we are getting closer, but it is tough. One thing that did help me was when my SO and I created a sort of timeline so that I knew it was in the plans (even if it was down the road). His response was very open-ended, but it did allow me to drop the subject (not perfectly but I tried) to give him the time he needed for himself. Our timeline will come to a close in a little over a year and just recently he’s been making some progress/suggestions towards an upcoming marriage. He actually even remembered the timeline we made together years ago which shocked me since he hadn’t ever been one to worry about us getting married. This is only a suggestion of course, but something to think about. I think the key is communication and after 4 years, there’s nothing wrong with wanting to know where everything is going. Best of luck!!!

 

Post # 4
Member
823 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Hello and welcome!! 

Post # 5
Member
188 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

Hi! I think this is the reason I love reading the bee… it makes you feel less crazy.

My boyfriend and I have been going out since we were sophomores in high school. Seeing our high school friends getting married over the past few years is starting to take a toll on how I’m feeling. Everyone asks when we’re getting married every time we get together with other people. Some people automatically assume we’re already married. Luckily, our timeline got shorter since he’s trying to join the Navy this year. The date I have as my estimated wedding date is actually our 10 year anniversary (and I’ve been waiting since we graduated high school), so hopefully I won’t be a waiting be any longer!

The great thing is… you know you’ll get the proposal. The bad thing is… you don’t know the where, when, and how of it.

Post # 6
Member
532 posts
Busy bee

I am in the same boat, we have been together for over 5 years and we finally went ring shopping last summer. Waiting is so frustrating!!! Our friends who started dating the same time we did are married already and have two kids! Now other friends of ours, who have been dating for much less time than we are, are engaged. He says it’s coming soon, but I am a little frustrated to say the least. I am glad that other bees are in the same situation, and that we can come here to talk about it! The worst part for me has been holidays. My birthday, His birthday, Christmas, New Years, Valentine’s Day…. each time one of these days comes along, I get my hopes up and end up disappointed.

Post # 7
Member
2691 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

Welcome!

So glad you found your way here because so many of us feel the same way!

Post # 8
Member
141 posts
Blushing bee

So many men just want to wait for “work”.

My SO was no different. I told him he could wait for his work all he wanted, but it was unfair of him to ask me to do the same when it wasn’t my priority. I told him quite clearly my priority was marriage and children and that I had a timeline for these things, and that if his “timeline” did not fit in with mine, well then he would have to let me find someone who’s timeline did.

That led to a compromise. Our marriage and children will fit in with my timeline (in 2013), but that I had to back-off about engagement and leave it to him. He said he would have it sorted by no later than April this year, or I am free to walk (and he knows I will).

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