(Closed) Good news… and not so good news…

posted 7 years ago in Wellness
Post # 3
Member
1927 posts
Buzzing bee

Personally… I would go ahead and start trying..  Having a child is a lot more important than fitting into a dress on your wedding day.  Obviously I think most people would prefer to be married before they get pregnant but if you guys were going to start trying right away anyway why not go ahead and get started on the process to increase your likelyhood of being able to conceive.

Post # 4
Member
415 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Go for it!  I actually carrying during your wedding is really sweet – your future child is there with you! 

Post # 5
Member
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

First off, congrats on only having a cyst and nothing more serious!!

I think if it were me, and I wanted to have kids, I would take my docs advice and start trying. This might be your last shot at having any, would you regret your decision to wait if you then couldn’t have anymore babies?

Post # 6
Member
3368 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

I would do whatever was necessary to have another child, if you and Darling Husband will want more children in the future.  I had just read your happy post about the test coming back with good news… hang in there!

Post # 7
Member
3461 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I think only you can make that decision.  If you decide to wait, then you can ready yourself by going off any BC now (use some other protection) and be ready to go after – or 1-2 months before when it won’t show.  If you decide to start now, just pick a dress that will be able to accommodate it (e.g. empire) if you do get pregnant. 

I was told I have PCOS when I did a research study.  Fiance doesn’t seem to worry about it, but I worry more about my fertility as I get older, so I am hoping to persuade him to start trying not to long after we’re married.  (I’m 32)

Post # 10
Member
5118 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@Jd64848704: I’m glad that your Fiance is so on board and supportive. It sounds like he and your son are making the best of this situation and cheering you up πŸ™‚

As for what people will think, psh on them! I’m sure that no one will judge, and, if there are very traditional people in your audience, word of mouth from close family may get around to them that you two are so happy to be blessed with another child*ren (for your hopeful twins;) ) after the medical obstacles you faced. Seriously, people become VERY understanding when they hear that little phrase. 

Post # 11
Member
7403 posts
Busy Beekeeper

Well congrats on on finding out you okay on the first matter. I would so be on board with getting starting a family earlier than planned. Your FH and his family sound amazing. Good luck with everything. 

Post # 13
Member
1240 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Girl I’m so glad he’s on board! Good for you! Do what you want! And I’m glad dinner worked cheering you up!

 

And even more glad nothing serious in the mammogram! 

Post # 15
Member
3461 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@Jd64848704: No, but you’re right, I really should.  In some ways, it doesn’t feel “real” to me because it wasn’t something MY doctor said, but the doctor on the study.  It’s easier to ignore.  (I also don’t have some characteristics such as weight gain or excessive hair, just the acne, delightful as that is, and slightly longer period cycles).  But there’s no reason to disbelieve it – she was doing an ultrasound and pointed to the dots on the screen.  My doctor has never done an ultrasound on me.  I watch my sister struggle with fertility so it’s certainly something that I take seriously.  That said, I do want to wait until I’m married, I guess I’m traditional after all in that regard.  (It will also save a ton of headache from my parents…)  I’m not quite ready to be a parent but I would choose it today over not having kids, if that was the choice.  I need to sit down with him and tell him that I want to start trying soon after we get married.  He commented recently that I’ve started saying negative things about having kids (“if I can even have them…” that I never used to, so we talked then about my worries, but not about what to do.  The problem is that he is nowhere near ready to have kids (despite being 4 years older and having most of his friends start families) – in fact, he waivers on wanting them although he knows I really want them and agreed to have them before I moved in with him.  I also need to really sit down with my doctor and talk to her about this.

Anyhow, I have no answers for you, but PM if you want some support! 

ETA: If you are willing to be open with his family to a degree, that may help with them understanding.  You don’t have to say exactly what you are doing, but a casual reference to “Oh, we saw the doctor today to discuss options considering my PCOS” will set the stage should you get pregnant early.   And you can always announce the happy event with “We are so thrilled….given my medical condition our doctor was very concerned…” 

Post # 16
Member
5110 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 2011

I dont have personal experience with this, but if a bigger family is what you want then start TTC. It would not hurt! I know how great being a mommy is and I hope that you and your family are blessed!! Good luck with everything even though its not the greatest news try and make the best of it! 

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