(Closed) Got an invitation to a very posh looking wedding…

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
5494 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2011

sorry but this sort of rubs me the wrong way.  You should go to the wedding if you can and the people getting married are someone you want to support.  But going because it looks “posh” is just kind of……sad and opportunistic.    If that’s the only reason you would go then save them the money and decline.

Post # 4
Member
4046 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

Why not go? Can you afford it? You are not there to gawk, you’re there to celebrate, right?

I know what you mean, we are going to a very posh wedding next year in NYC. I’m excited but also feel silly dressing up formally like I’m faking something LOL.

Post # 7
Member
11752 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Sounds like fun, if you have the $ go for it – you guys could always make a romantic getaway weekend of it, with a little bit of wedding thrown in?!  

Post # 8
Member
5494 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2011

@mspartridge:  I guess the levity of the comment was lost in writting.  I didn’t mean to offend you.  This is just one of those things that really rubs me the wrong way because I’ve seen plenty of this go on.  People going to an expensive wedding to take advantage of the free food, drinks and entertainment when in reality they really don’t care much about the bride and groom.  I’m glad to hear you’re not one of those people.   

Post # 9
Member
2697 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@mspartridge:  I feel like that every time I’m with my husband’s grandmother. So many country clubs. So very awkward.

Post # 11
Member
9056 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

Yikes… I agree “taking advantage of free food and drink” shouldn’t be the only reason someone attends a wedding but people who throw these types of weddings must at least on some level want to impress the people they’re inviting with the whole spectacle. Otherwise all weddings would be simple backyard affairs. I wouldn’t really feel bad accepting an invite partially to check out what kind of deal they have planned. If ones invited obviously the couple feels close enough with them that they want them there. 

Post # 12
Member
594 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

@mspartridge:  don’t look at life comparing yourself to others, you will never find satisfaction in yourself. if you decide to go to this wedding, celebrate the couple !

Post # 13
Member
1239 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

@mspartridge:  have they given you much notice about their wedding seeing as you have to travel? they might be hurt if they travelled to your wedding and have spent money while planning their own and you rsvp no because you are too tired to go to theirs. just a thought.

Post # 14
Member
6256 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: March 2014

@SapphireSun:  Agreed. I might be willing to travel a little farther than I’d generally feel comfortable doing if I thought the wedding was going to be amazing, but I’d not feel bad about this as I’m the sort of person who as a rule covers my plate. “You want to throw a lavish wedding and have lots of attendees, and you’ll feed me a filet mignon? Sweet, I’ll come to enjoy the food and company and see the fancy, and I’ll bring you a fine china place setting or a 800-thread-count sheet set.”

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