Post # 1
What cheese can u hide a small horse in? Marscapone
What does a cheese say to himself when he looks in the mirror? halloumi
How do u start a fight with a grizzly bear camebert!
what does a mexican have underneath his carpet? underlay underlay!
what do you call a mexican whose car got stolen? carlos
i cant help it.i love silly jokes. any others?!
Post # 3
I have one that I never thought was as dirty as it is, I’ve always thought it was just cute. (If you don’t like a slightly dirty joke, turn away now! lol)
What did the egg say to the boiling water? It may take me a minute to get hard, I was just laid this morning!
Post # 4
My son is 4 and likes to tell knock knock jokes that make no sense, except this one, it was hilarious.
Son: Knock Knock
Daddy: Who’s There?
Daddy: Cheese Who?
Son: Cheesy like all your jokes daddy!
I almost died I was laughing so hard
Post # 5
What did the snail say while riding on a turtle?
Post # 6
Two sausages are frying in a pan.
One sausage says to the other “my goodness, it’s getting warm in here!”
What does the other sausage say?
“Oh my god, a talking sausage!!!!”
ETA-this is my all time favorite joke. I told it to my SO on our first date. Why he went out with me a second time, I have no idea. He now, 11 years later begs me to tell it when he’s in a sour mood. 🙂
Post # 7
I grew up in the yo mama generation…
Yo mama’s so stupid she thought a quarterback was a refund.
Yo mama’s so country she thought matching luggage was two shopping bags from the same store.
Yo mama’s so old she farted and dust came out.
I don’t know if it’s funny or sad that I could keep going all night with these.
Post # 8
Post # 9
@LaCroix: I like the luggage one.
Post # 10
This is my FAVE… But delivery might be important…
A panda bear walks into a bar. He walks up to the bartender and says “I’ll have a rum……………………
The bartender says, “what’s with the pause?”
The panda looks down at his hands (usually just do this, don’t say it) ” what, these? I’ve had em my whole life!”
Def doesn’t translate to a written joke. Sigh.
Post # 11
A nurse friend told me this one:
I can’t tell you.
Post # 12
i didnt mean to post this thread twice – sorry!! when i tried to post it the first time it said database error or something so i tried again. could the mods delete the other one (as i dont think i can?!)
loving all the jokes though =)
Post # 13
- Wedding: April 2012 - St. Philip Catholic Church/Arcadia Brewing Co.
Why did the hipster burn his mouth?…………..He drank his coffee before it was cool.
How do you make a tissue dance?………………Put a little boogie in it.
What does a nosey pepper do?…………………..Get Jalapino business
Where does the king keep his his armies?………..In his SLEEVIES!!!
Ok…. That is enough from me. I love silly jokes though.
Post # 14
@Mrs. Aardvark: Lmao!!!!!!
These are my kind of jokes!!!
Post # 15
@axeyourmakeupkit: One of my older sisters loved the country ones, she used to crack me up when I was little.
Here’s one that’s fitting for the Bee: yo mama’s so country her wedding cake was made out of cornbread.
Post # 16
Lol. My SO has lots of yo momma so fat jokes.
My jokes are all fit for five year olds.