Post # 1
I kept the guest list that I gave my Maid/Matron of Honor for my bridal shower fairly short, since wanted to keep it fairly small and intimate (close friends and family). My Future Mother-In-Law has a family friend that I’ve met once. But the meeting was brief and maybe 3 or so years ago, I wouldn’t be able to pick the person out if a crowd if I tried.
Fiance had talked to his mom a week or so before the shower and was a bit upset her friend didn’t get an invite. Fiance explained that I wanted to keep it small, and told her that I don’t really know her.
I had my shower, and a gift was there from said family friend. I thought it was a bit odd. I’m thankful for the gift and all, but now I feel bad I didn’t extend the invite. I’ll be sending a thank you of course.
Anything like this happen to anyone else?
Post # 2
Don’t let it worry you at all. You have no reason to invite someone you don’t even know. The gift that was sent was either a passive aggressive gesture for not inviting her or a true expression of good wishes given to the future daughter in law of her good friend.
Either way just send a heartfelt personal thank you note and don’t let it enter your head again.
Post # 3
Thanks for your response, it’s exactly what I needed to get things off my mind and not stress about it. Weird how such a short comment from a random person on the internet can give you such a peace of mind. Thank you.
Post # 4
Yes, I really won’t worry about it. I got a gift at my shower from someone who we hadn’t invited (she lives out of state, we probably would have invited her if she was local, but I still felt bad about it). I would just send the woman a lovely thank you and that’s that.
(Like PP said, you shouldn’t have invited her if you don’t know her. I really wouldn’t worry or feel bad about this one!)
Post # 5
Don’t worry at all!! It really was just a very kind gesture to give the gift. I would suggest that you thank her for the “wedding gift” in the card, not the “shower gift”, ESPECIALLY if she is not invited to the wedding.
Post # 6
My cousin hosted my shower and her aunt on the other side of the family basically invited herself. The only way I heard about it before was that another cousin was asking if the hostess needed help and the hostess said her aunt was “so exicted to help with the shower”. Weird because I think the only time I spent more than 5 minutes with her was at the hostess’ wedding. Maybe she wanted to help with mine because she saw that I put in a lot of work at my cousin’s wedding? I dunno.
Anyway- she came, brought a gift (from my registry even!) and was very sweet. I had to track down her address (and name!) for the thank you gift. There’s not much to be done about it- just thank her for the lovely gift and say how much you’ll use and appreciate it. Done. It’s totally weird that she sent a gift when she wasn’t invited.
Post # 7
Not the exact same, but I definitely had a few gifts show up at the shower my in-law’s threw from people who aren’t even invited to the wedding! They’re getting a thank you note, and I’m not concerned beyond that!
Post # 8
Yep. No need to worry about the motive behind the gift. Send a nice thank you card asap and you’ve covered your bases.
I got a number of wedding gifts from uninvited guests. At first, I felt guilty for not extending an invitation to those people, but that’s silly. We spent a long time on our guest list and every acquaintance didn’t make the list. Their decision to send us a gift was a sign of their kindness and not a statement about our guest list.