Got invited to an "online shower" ? Feeling a little weird about this one…

posted 3 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
Member
2854 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2018

Uhhh no. That is definitely NOT a thing. I honestly would not have even sent a gift if I were invited to an online “shower.” 

Post # 3
Member
9581 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2015

It is in incredibly poor taste and you were very kind to participate despite that. Why doesnt she just cut to the chase and make a gofundme page UGH. I definitely would have just ignored that “invite”, used indeed.

Post # 4
Member
977 posts
Busy bee

So…..not a shower. Just a gift grab. Terrible.

Post # 5
Member
14 posts
Newbee

So you got an e-mail that said ‘Congratulations, I picked you to buy me stuff but I don’t want to see your face, sorry.’!?

It’s incredibly generous of you to send a present. I would probably have, too – and then I would have sent an invite for an online birthday-shower. And online christmas-shower. And online vacation-shower. Easter-shower. I’m-sad-it’s-monday-shower. As long as the message sinks in.

Post # 6
Member
497 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I participated in an online shower for a friend who had moved to another country! It was great to celebrate with her even though she was so far away. But this sounds different.

Post # 7
Member
5562 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2017

View original reply
somethingblue222 :  

It’s not an online shower. It’s, please take a look at our registry and send us gifts!

They are just prettying it up by calling it an online shower. I have never heard of an online shower.

If you want to share your registry for people to send you gifts, just have the balls to do it. Being fake about it makes it even worse.

Post # 8
Member
9382 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

woah, gift grabby.  i would decline and not send a gift.

if i really liked michelle, i would bring a gift when i visited after the baby is born.

Post # 9
Member
4716 posts
Honey bee

View original reply
somethingblue222 :  What?!? An online shower to skip on entertaining & refreshments/finger foods for the guests (given that guests are able to drive to a venue together). The other day I was just reading a thread about a bride wanting to invite some guests to the ceremony only and not for the reception afterwards. Seriously, WTF are these people thinking?!? Some people have balls!

Post # 10
Member
1352 posts
Bumble bee

Meh, does anyone actually like attending showers? I only go out of a sense of obligation. I’d much rather something like this where I can send a gift without the guilt of declining the party.

Post # 11
Member
917 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2015 - Cathedral of the Immaculate Conception / Courtyard Marriott Legacy Ballroom

Yeah, that doesn’t sound like an online shower! I didn’t attend it, but one of my old childhood friends had an online shower – she didn’t just ask for gifts, she opened all of them in a video stream so people who couldn’t attend would be able to see it. They actually live very far away from most of their family and friends, so I though this was a good compromise for people who wouldn’t travel to a baby shower. I sent a gift but didn’t watch the video – opening gifts is actually my least favorite part of any type of showertongue-out

Post # 12
Member
4639 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

View original reply
somethingblue222 :  you are nicer than me. I would have sent a virtual card with a congratulations, for a virtual shower….

Post # 13
Member
1076 posts
Bumble bee

Unless she’s on bed rest (which I assume you would know about!) an unable to have a traditional shower, this is incredibly tacky.  

 

Agree with pp- I wouldn’t have sent a gift (on principle) but would have brought dinner & a gift over once the baby is born. 

Post # 14
Member
3275 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2017

That takes balls to be that tacky! She would get nothing.

View original reply
numa89 :  great idea!!! 

Post # 15
Member
1386 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

View original reply
HoneysHoney :  I like attending showers! Well, I guess it depends on who’s going to be there. I don’t like showers if I don’t know anyone there. I like seeing all the gifts opened up, hanging out with everyone and then all the food….maybe I’m just weird lol

Yeah, I think a virtual shower is pretty rude! If I wasn’t super close to the person I wouldn’t have sent anything. Definitely gift grabby.

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