(Closed) Got married on aug 3 things went well but feeling sad? anyone else feel this way

posted 8 years ago in Married Life
  • poll: After your wedding did you feel
    Sad : (8 votes)
    24 %
    Happy : (5 votes)
    15 %
    Relieved : (8 votes)
    24 %
    Confused : (1 votes)
    3 %
    joyfull : (4 votes)
    12 %
    blissful : (5 votes)
    15 %
    angry : (0 votes)
    Tearful : (0 votes)
    Cant stop smiling : (3 votes)
    9 %

    34 votes

    • Post # 1
    Member
    172 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    Ok so,  I now know not to have a wedding on a tuesday because well not as many people are able to show and people have to leave early.  I planned and planned for a year planning out big details and the smallest of details and yet some of my plans didnt turn out.  Im feeling icky because my husbands family all came in from everywhere and my family and friends that did come didnt want to get to know any of his family.  After it was all over and people went home on the 5th.  I felt really really sad and my stomach was upset.  Days later and after the honeymoon i look at the left over wedding stuff and im still sad.  sad that some things didnt happen the way i wanted it to and sad that our friends and family arent here and even sad that no one signed the picture matt that i had.  toward the end of the decorating i was so busy that i just left everything up to my friends and family.  they did a good job so i dont know why im feeling this way.  our wedding ended way to early.  our ceremony was at 245 and my husband and i got to the reception hall at about 400 had our dance ate threw boquet and garder ect.  people started leaving around 530 right after dinner.  Even my uncle (who walked me down the isle) was going to leave at about 530 and i started to cry and asked him to please stay just a bit longer.  so he would stay and about 645 he say he was leaving and of course id start to cry uncontrollably again.  this went on until he finally did leave at 800.  No one saved me any of the flowers or food.  It got so bad about me not wanting the night to end that my husband/ my aunt/my sister / my friend from when i was 8/ and my cousin all went out to the bar—-in our wedding attire mind you! 

    I have never been married before and i have never even been to a real wedding and im wondering if this is really how it is suppose to go?  People at the wedding said it was a great wedding and they had a good time; im not sure?

    Anyone else feel this gut renching ache about it being over and the things that could of been different?

    Tagged: 

    Post # 3
    Member
    762 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2010

    It’s hard when you plan for so long and it’s over in the blink of an eye. I wish I had done some things different too and I get upset, but I remind myself that it’s really not a big deal. Now we are married and that’s what is important.

    Post # 4
    Member
    829 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 2010

    You should plan a vow renewal.. have a small party on a Saturday and renew your vows.

    My wedding went great but I loved the fact of having everyone together I decided to have a party for our 1 yr anniversary LOL In a few years we will do a vow renewal.

     

    Post # 5
    Member
    2249 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: March 2018

    no matter what- it goes too fast. I planned ours to go really long because I knwe I would want to savor every second, and people stayed untill 11, and it still felt like it was over in the blink of an eye! I would focus on what you loved about the day and your new husband, and maybe plan a fun and relaxed one year anniversary party where you can spend the time with your family.

    Post # 6
    Member
    6661 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: May 2010

    I see what you are saying. Your heart and soul went into planning the biggest event of your life and it’s shocking to realize that it isn’t as big a deal to everyone else. To that effect, I was shocked at the people who RSVP’d no, didn’t RSVP and left my wedding early. But one of my BIGGEST pet peeves is when I’m trying to leave something and I”m held hostage by the organizer. It makes me never want to see that person again. I don’t like feeling trapped. So I gracefully let people come and go as they needed to and didn’t give anyone a hard time for RSVPing no. I focused on my husband and honestly there were so many wonderful moments that day that anything even slightly disappointing is easy to forget about 🙂

    Post # 7
    Member
    2866 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    I think since you had it on a weekday in the afternoon that made it a bit odd for people. Beyond that I think you’re choosing to focus on the negative and that will only bring you down. Why not focus on all the things that DID go right?

    You can’t change what happened so I understand why you’re disappointed but continuing to focus on the negative things will only keep you in a funk for longer.

    Post # 8
    Member
    10366 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2010

    How about telling us about the lovely parts? That might help you focus on the positive. I know most people would have trouble with a weekday wedding that was in the middle of the day – but you can’t go back and change it, so maybe post some great pics and tell us your favorite parts? That’s usually the best way for me to get myself focusing in something happier.

    Post # 9
    Member
    172 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    Thats a great idea crayfish….

    My uncle was very supportive and walked me down the isle 🙂  After my dad died 15 years ago my uncle always said he would do what it takes to help be there in the areas my dad would of been there.  A man to his word.  And he looked so handsome and he was so nervous it was cute.  It made me happy he cared enough to even be nervous and to get his lines right.  He practiced 🙂

    My sister (moh )never left my side from the time she got into town until the time she had to go back to north dekota.  and she even wore a dress 🙂  she hates dresses. 

    I had my two aunts come in from out of state and help decorate.  Brians mom and dad came in from new jersey and helped cook a huge rehersal dinner.  It was great to finally meet his dad after 6 years.  Brians uncle and aunt and also his god parents came from nj.  My friend from when i was 8 came from california just for the wedding. 

    I met a lady at work named mary and she and i have become friends over this past year.  she really stepped it up.  She and i had gone through my vision on how id like to see the decorations go and when i didnt have any time to show others marry showed them and the place looked beautiful.  they did a great job.

    the photographer that we hired she was great.  when the curls were falling out of my hair right before the ceremony she was right there recurling them 🙂  oh ya and did i mention the photographer also calmed my mother down several times.  penny was such a great support. she was photographer/hair refixer/mother calmer.  a multitasker that is for sure.  the pics she took arent back yet but ill post some that brians dad took.

    my husband looked awsome!  he and I are very simple people and he even wore a suit and everything.  We fumbled over my dress during the 1st dance it was fun.

    the end of the night when people were just about out of there my sister grabbed my hand and she and i did a duet on the kareoke machine.  It was our favorite song growning up.

    Did i mention my mother for the most part behaved herself.  She was a lady and i was proud.

    The caterer did a great job on the prime rib 🙂  Home cooked and everything!

    My husband and i are usually alone/ our fam and friends live so far away that when they came for those few days it was great!  I miss family around.  sad to see them all go and unfortunatly i know that they wont ever be together like that again- people live too far away.  In the same aspect it was wonderful and fun to have everyone around so it makes me sad when they left. 

    I will have pics of the good times and im trying to focus on that

    here are just a few pics my father in law took

     

    [attachment=1185653,150112] [attachment=1185653,150113] [attachment=1185653,150114] [attachment=1185653,150115]

    Post # 10
    Member
    275 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    In the big group photo, you and your husband look so happy 🙂 Try to capture that glee and think about how while your wedding is only one day, your marriage is endless

    Post # 11
    Member
    1016 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2010

    It sounds like you had the most important parts of a wonderful wedding – a loving and supportive husband, your families who also love you, good food! and fun memories like karaoke with your sister!

    You were a beautiful bride and your husband is so  handsome too.  I still wonder how my wedding was for everyone else and it is sad to think that you never get to recapture the day or have all the same people together again but think of how blessed you were (all of us who have had the same are!) to have had that experience at all – some people never get to be surrounded by people who love them when they start their married lives with the person they love the most!  Think of all the wonderful moments that lie ahead – hopefully you’ll be more happy than sad if you think of it that way!

    Post # 12
    Member
    502 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2010

    Don’t feel bad. I think it is great advice to focus on the positive but you’re not a weirdo or anything. I was very upset about my ceremony. (We started late because of my hair which I hated anyway, people didn’t know to stand up for me, most were hot and sweaty by then, I didn’t write vows, my pictures are not as smiley as they should be, etc.) We’ll get over it.

    Post # 13
    Member
    9029 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    lovely photo! yes weekday weddings can be harder than weekends.. people find it alittle harder to stay late but the photos show you having fun and am sure the day was great even if it didnt last as long as you wanted…focusing on the great parts will help you to stop feelin sad

    The topic ‘Got married on aug 3 things went well but feeling sad? anyone else feel this way’ is closed to new replies.

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