Post # 1
So, I just took ThunderBunny’s survey for her stats class, and one question really made me stop in my tracks.. that question about the government should be able to regulate family size.. I’ll be honest, at times I kind of wish there were certain people who were limited.
I have 2 kids on my caseload at school right now who are brothers.. 1 in kdg 1 in 1st grade. They have 2 more kids, 1 about to be in preschool & a newborn. They live in a trailer, can’t afford to pay their electric bill so they have 1 kerosene lamp to heat the place, the kids come to school freezing all the time, wearing filthy clothes, their faces aren’t washed, they have constant runny noses. The poor kindergartener obviously has a sinus infection because the stuff coming out of his nose is green, but the mom insists he just has “mild hayfever.” Uhh, no. He got in trouble the other day for not listening, and told us “I tried to listen to Mrs ___ but my ears are all full so I can’t hear her, but I really tried, I did!”..
Just my personal opinion seeing what these kids go through, I just feel like it’s irresponsible to have yet another baby when you can’t even take care of yourself. The dad’s teeth are all rotted and the mom finally had her few remaining teeth pulled because they were all rotted out, too.. Fiance watched some documentary on drugs & meth addicts not long ago, and the appearance (and teeth) of the meth heads reminded me of the parents.. although now at 32/33, the mom has no teeth left. The school cares so so much for these kids & the parents want nothing to do with the school. Just frustrating!
Obviously I am not for the government regulating family size, but does anyone else sometimes feel like some people just should not be allowed to have kids? Being in my field, I’ve seen plenty of parents & grandparents bring their kids in INSISTING they have some sort of disability & then get super pissed when we say we’re not seeing anything out of the ordinary because then they don’t get their extra social security income.
Anyone else see this happen in their line of work?
Post # 3
I definitely don’t think it’s the government’s place to regulate family size, I just wish people had enough sense themselves to know when they can’t handle raising a child properly.
In my line of work I see a lot of parents who don’t deserve to have their children. I always want to just take them home with me, it’s completely heartbreaking.
Post # 4
@kt23525: I have definitely seen it. While I don’t think the government should be able to tell you how many children you can have (Ex: China), I have, however, seen families that struggled to support their large family. I feel as though the children are being done a great disservice. I am one of four and even that can get insane! I do not like that show with the Duggards (sp? lol). You can see children raising children in that household. I am concerned for the psychological implications this could have later in life for the children.
Post # 5
@SapphireSun: I agree with you. There were children I wanted to take home too!
Post # 6
I see both sides of the argument for government regulation of family size. I favor the side of no regulation.. but at the same time, I definitely see why some governments do it. I just wish that people would realize how many children they can handle.. financially and otherwise.. and try to stay within that without the government having to step in. I feel the same way about proposed regulations/ taxes on fast food. If people were more inclined to look out for themselves, things like this wouldn’t have so many supporters.
Then, there is the overpopulation issue… which doesn’t affect us so much today compared to what will happen beyond our lifetime. It’s important to be environmentally aware & look beyond your own life sometimes.
Post # 7
While I completely understand where you are comming from, I also feel like alot of what you said about this one particular family, is alot of assumption.
I know this one family, (who I will not name names, or how I know them), but they are very close to me, and dear to my heart. They have three children. Three beautiful ,smart children. All of which were not planned. These children also, have snotty noses. And lets be honest here. Children who grow up in homes of 3 or more kids tend to have snotty noses because the germs keep on spreading. I grew up with a snotty nose constantly, and I remember my mother always told me to blow my nose! It was not because of neglect.
Now back to what I was saying. This lady also has rotting teeth. Although, just recently has been taking care of them, because of education. She does not do meth. I repeat, does NOT do meth. She is poor. She did not have the proper nutrition throughout her pregnancy, and also lacked in hygiene, so yes she has rotten teeth. However, it bothers me that you even bothered to mention this, not knowing either way if she is or is not doing drugs. Perhaps if you really believe that you should be calling social services or something. Anyways, this lady I know is poor, uneducated, and has no work experience. She has no motivation because of her lack of self confidence. I wouldn’t dream of saying she should not have anymore children ( she did get a tubal after the third child, so it will not happen.) She is a great mom. She does homework with the children, takes them out every weekend, even if its for a walk, or the thrift store to get a toy. She is there, every.single.day. She never goes out on the weekends, she never blows money on anything that she shouldn’t. Money does not equate a good household, nor does it mean a child will grow up to be successful. The odds are better, yes, but that doesn’t mean anything.
Sometimes families, that you speak of, like this one family in particular, need education, and encouragement to do better. Not be judged by others.
Post # 8
I can’t imagine giving the government that much power, but at the same time I think someone should stop people from getting to “19 Kids and Counting” size.
Post # 9
I am 100% against the government regulating family size.
Yes, there are scumbag parents out there, which is unfortunate. But people’s rights should not be taken away because of a minority of irresponsible people.
If they are inadequate parents and neglect/abuse their kids, that’s why we have social services groups (I know it’s called different things in different states, in Kansas it’s called Social and Rehabilitation Services).
Post # 10
Perhaps someone should call DCFS or CPS or whatever they call it were you are. I sort of agree with Cash000 that sometimes the quality of parenting is better than the living situation. I also think though that children should not be left in situations that are unhealthy or harmful to them because their parents are not maliciously hurting them. A five year old with “full ears” that make it so that he can’t hear, has an ear infection. Those are terribley painful, and I am guessing that the green nose issues is in fact a sinus infection. These children are suffering chronic pain. I am assuming if they are filthy and cold too that they are not being seen regularly by a pediatrician.
Post # 11
I took that survey too and I knew this question was going to make it to the boards!
While allowing the government to have that kind of control over it’s citizens is a scary thought, there are absolutely situations where I feel a regulation is needed. I don’t work in a field that sees a lot of it but just from personal experience with friends and aquaintances, a regulation on family size would save the tax payers a boat load of money.
I know people who receive public assistance yet they continue to pop out kids. When you so clearly can’t afford the kid you have, yet you pop out another baby and are already talking about the third, theres a problem. I don’t want to get too deep into the whole public assistance thing since I realize that’s not what this thread is about but I do think the world would be a much better place if certain people weren’t allowed to reproduce anymore.
Post # 12
Does anyone watch the show ‘Private Practice?’ Did you see that episode where the mom had multiple children that died or she left on the street (or tried to sell!) and some of them wanted to try to get her to agree to get her tubes tied (even with money). It was a tough episode to watch, but it sort of goes along with this discussion, because would we regulate by taking kids away or adopting them out or sterilizing parents? It was an intense episode, 4.10 called ‘Just Lose It.’
I don’t think that we should let family size be regulated, but I sure wish there were more welfare checks and follow ups. Some kids have such terrible lives when they deserve so much more.
Post # 13
Yeah I totally agree with this. Children should always be put first, and if they are comming to school with ear infections, not looked after, and sinus infections, if that is what it is, than someone needs to be the adult and step up. Perhaps, talk to the parents, and let them know your concerns. Or go to social services (whatever it is called there) and they can do a follow up.
Post # 14
I definitely am against family regulation. I grew up Catholic, and know many people with great, well adjusted families – that happen to have 6 or more children. Growing up, I baby-sat for a family of 9 children – I baby-sat for them because the parents didn’t expect the older ones to raise the younger ones (they only baby-sat in extreme circumstances, and got paid to do so). I know that there are some families that have only 1, but that child isn’t cared for properly. It’s a personal issue, unfortunately. It’s not one that the government can, or should, regulate.
Post # 15
I don’t think the government should regulate how many kids, necessarily.
BUT I do think that there should be some kind of mandatory counselling/education in order to have children. I am so tired of people who are totally inept as parents being able to have kids just because they have just enough brains to get a penis into a vagina. I think that you should have to meet minimum requirements to take those kids out of the hospital, be able to pass a childcare test, have a minimum income level … something.
Post # 16
I don’t think that the government should be allowed to regulate family size. They should, however, stop enabling people by giving them free houses, free phones, welfare, food stamps, etc. and they just keep having babies and their “free money” keeps going up each month.