Post # 1
My fiance and I are getting married next June, and when we got engaged in April of this year, we went a little nuts/crazy-with-excitement and created a rather large wedding party of 10, as well as two flower girls and one ring bearer. I have two questions.
1. Is this party waaaaaaaay too large for what will probably end up being a 50 – 60 guest wedding (including attendants)? We’re inviting close to 100 people but not expecting that many to come due to various events people already lined up.
2. Is there a way to reduce the number of people in our wedding party in a graceful way? I have two sisters who are my co-MOHs and my Fiance has 2 brothers who are his co-BMs, and those are non-negotiable. Maybe reducing the party to just those 4 would be a better choice?
I don’t know, maybe I’m just overthinking the situation and I should throw caution to the wind and say “Who cares?! Let’s have a wedding party of 30!” . . . . yeah or not. The downside of overthinking this whole thing is I eventually get stressed out about it, start worrying about the $ I’m asking them to spend, and I just want to chuck the whole thing and elope. (It also doesn’t help that one of my MOHs is fighting me every step of the way on Bridesmaid or Best Man attire, colors, wedding venue. . . but that’s for a different post.)
So yes. Any help/words of the wise would be greatly appreciated!
Post # 3
Well, are the people in your wedding party close friends, in addition to your family? I get that you have family and having JUST family makes sense….but I also don’t think there is a graceful way to say, “sorry, i take it back, you’re not in the wedding party” even though the wedding itself is only 50-60 attendants. I just don’t think there’s a way to do that without it leaving a bad taste in your mouth.
Post # 4
It’s a sticky situation, I assume a 10 person wedding party means five on your side, five on FI’s? It’s a larger party but not super huge. I think your non-relative friends would be kind of disappointed. My advice is to throw caution to the wind!!! Do your best to keep costs down for them, but don’t stress about it, when they said yes to your invitation they were also accepting some costs as well 🙂
Post # 5
Our wedding had ~56 people there including our wedding party which was 5 on each side and our Flower Dog and Ring Dog Escort, so i think it’s fine. It’s all about having the people close to you there.
Post # 6
There is definitely no graceful way to do that and if you try you are going to end up with some really hurt feelings. If you weren’t sure of details and such yet, you shouldn’t have been asking people in the first place but unfortunately, whats done is done.
If these are people who are close to you and your truely want standing with you, screw what other might think of have a ten person wedding party at a small wedding! I don’t think you should ask any of them to step down.