(Closed) Graciously getting out of opening gifts?

posted 4 years ago in Gifts and Registries
Post # 2
Member
47377 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

View original reply
babeba :  “Thank you for offering to host, but we are not comfortable doing that.”

I really dislike the whole idea of opening gifts in front of other people (not at a shower where gifts are to be expected and usually less costly). I think giving the nosy aunt an opportunity to compare what each person gifted is just wrong.

Post # 3
Member
1633 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

I’m not sure I totally understand. When do they want this to take place? And are they referring to you opening the wedding gifts that people do decide to give you?

It’s pretty standard to open gifts at a bridal shower, but I’ve never heard of a party/gathering specifically for the bride and groom to open wedding gifts.

If the event at your MIL’s house is a shower, I’m of the opinion you need to open gifts there. But if what you’re talking about is the wedding reception itself or rehearsal dinner or brunch the next day or just a gathering specifically to go through your wedding gifts (weird), I don’t think that’s appropriate at all. What about people who don’t bring a gift to the actual wedding? Either because they sent it ahead of time or will send it later, or because they made a donation in your name as you suggested? I feel it’s awkward to publicly open gifts from some individuals, and make a big show of it, when there are others present who did not come with a gift in hand.

I’d put my foot down and say no, and that you will thank everyone personally by handwritten note, which is the appropriate thing to do.

Post # 5
Member
2506 posts
Sugar bee

View original reply
babeba :  uhm, no. It is not standard to open wedding presents in front of guests, and since a lot of presents are checks, that’s really awkward. Plus, you don’t need family knowing all the presents you got. It’s nosy. Just tell them NO. (Fwiw, I don’t even like present opening at showers and that IS standard). 

Post # 6
Member
47377 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

View original reply
GreenGables :  
View original reply
ilovesophia :   It is not uncommon in some areas for the bride and groom to open gifts the morning after the wedding at a drop-in brunch for friends and family. Not my idea of fun.

Post # 7
Member
5397 posts
Bee Keeper

View original reply
babeba : I have never heard of a gift opening thing for a wedding, but looks like there is some background to this from the other posters. I would also feel uncomfortable with that. I would like more information on how they responded you saying your SO is not comfortable with that? Because they should respect your wishes. Thank you cards should go out for all gifts regardless of if you wanted them or not. But I wouldn’t like a gift opening party either, so awkward. I opened them at my bridal shower, but it was close friends and only a few people so it was ok.

Post # 8
Member
1633 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

View original reply
julies1949 :  Didn’t realize! The more you know…

Post # 9
Member
11392 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

Hey girl! I hope you guys can tell her “thank you, but that doesn’t work for us.” And stick to it, because that sounds really uncomfortable.

Would she be okay with the morning after brunch for family? You could suggest that in lieu of the exchange. *fingers crossed* 

The topic ‘Graciously getting out of opening gifts?’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors