(Closed) Grad party, bridal shower, wedding…..too much?

posted 5 years ago in Parties
  • poll: What should I do?

    Have the graduation party in early May but move the bridal shower to April.

    Don't have the graduation party, just have a bridal shower.

    Just have the party and the shower in May if that's what you want.

    Don't have the shower, just have a graduation party.

  • Post # 2
    Member
    1177 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: January 2017

    Well, you can have your mother plan the graduation party as a “for family” only event so that the bridal shower can include friends who may not be able to afford both and family who don’t mind going to both

    Post # 3
    Member
    9260 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper

    View original reply
    r06387:  Were my friends and I weird — none of us had college graduation parties. It’s obviously something to be very proud of, but you can be proud of something and not have a party for it. Especially one where gifts are customary, when you’re also having 2 other events shortly after where gifts are also customary. I’d skip the grad party.

    Post # 5
    Member
    2180 posts
    Buzzing bee

    View original reply
    r06387:  You don’t care about a shower, so I would have the graduation party and skip the shower entirely. It’s celebrating your accomplishment, you’re not limited to an all-female guest list and there’s no pressure for anyone to bring a gift. Win-win!

    Post # 6
    Member
    686 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2017

    I think both graduation party and bridal shower is fine if there’s no overlap or very, very limited overlap between the guest lists. Otherwise, I’d just choose one or the other. Those are both traditionally ryoes of parties where guests will feel obligated to bring gifts, so both parties + wedding within forty days is, I think, too much to ask of the same invitees. 

    Post # 7
    Member
    2251 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2015

    I was just gonna say the same as pp: ditch the shower and celebrate the graduation only. Otherwise, no matter how you put it, it looks gift grabby, even if you don’t mean it to. 

    Post # 8
    Member
    1014 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2016

    Are you planning your own shower?  That’s generally something your bridesmaids or family/friends would plan for you.  I’m in the same situation as you and will be having a graduation party in May then wedding in June.  I say have a grad party.

    Post # 10
    Member
    2594 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    I think that it might be a better move to restrict the number of “crossovers” between your graduation party and your bridal shower, if you can. I do think it’s a bit much to be invited to one person’s grad party AND bridal shower AND wedding all in a span of two months–but then again, ultimately, if anyone has a problem with it, they can decline.  

    Post # 11
    Member
    3302 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    What about combining the graduation party with the shower? 3 events in that amount of time is a bit much. 

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