(Closed) Grooms mom has alzthimers, what should we do for mother son dance?

posted 5 years ago in Reception
Post # 2
10315 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

How advanced is her Alzheimer’s? Perhaps a slideshow with pictures of the two of them and a nice song playing.

Post # 3
7881 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

I don’t think he should feel obligated to do a mother son dance if it will be uncomfortable or distressing for his mom. To keep it lowkey, perhaps he could give her a corsage or something before the festivities. 

Post # 4
4885 posts
Honey bee

Why do you have to do anything?  Mother/Son (or any spotlight) dances are completely optional and you don’t have to do something to fill time.  If he doesn’t want to do a dance, then what does he want to do?  If it’s nothing, that’s a completely acceptable answer, too – it’s his mom and his relationship so should be his decision about what to do/not do.

Post # 5
3323 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

Dont do any dances. I like a family style slideshow!

Post # 6
9252 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

View original reply
hdodge :  I’m agreeing with everyone else. They don’t have to do anything. I’ve been to a lot of weddings that didn’t do a mother-son dance, it’s nbd. If he wants to honor her, he could walk her to her seat before the ceremony or give a toast at the reception. If they have a special song, he could sit with her when it’s played and maybe quiety sing it together — it doesn’t have to be a “announced” or have all eyes on them. If he knows it’s special and she knows it’s special, that’s what matters and it takes a lot of pressure off both of them.

Post # 7
1848 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2016

View original reply
slomotion :  I love this idea! 


Post # 8
4 posts
  • Wedding: December 1969

Wedding planner here–You don’t have to do a mother son dance – not everyone does…Do what makes your finance and his mother most comfortable. You might think about playing a very sentimental tune of hers at somepoint during the night (and choose to announce it or make it something private). The gorom could give her a hug and you and your fiance dance the song with her watching….makes for a great pic


Post # 9
2352 posts
Buzzing bee

View original reply
hdodge :  Im going to guess that probably most people will know, and will understand what is going on with your fmil.  I like the idea about the slideshow, and it could be very sentimental paired with the right song.

Post # 11
320 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

My grandmother suffered from alzheimer’s and dementia as well.  In its advanced stages, she did later have trouble remembering family members but she could still remember her favorite hymn songs from church!  I would suggest considering playing an older song from back in her day from a favorite artist as she may be able to recall bits and pieces.  Of course it’s possible that she wouldn’t but it would still make a great tribute song in her honor.  The hug and toast sound perfect, Bee. 

Post # 12
2733 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: County courthouse

I agree with a slideshow of her and her son to her favorite song…she will not remember it, but the joy she feels in that moment from the pictures and her song will be worth it. I suggest someone film or take a series of pictures of that special moment between your fi and his mother.

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