(Closed) Groomsman lives with his mom and sister. One invite or three?

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
927 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@aggie2010:  For save the date’s it’s ok to do one for the “Smith Family” because they’re more informal. If you have two friends in a relationship I would send 2 so they each have one at their house as a reminder. Save the dates are much less formal than invites.

For invites – for a married couple, most people do “Mr. & Mrs. John Smith” if they have adult children living with them, they each get their own invite too. For your friends, again you would send each an invite. If you’re sending an invite to someone who you’re letting bring a +1 address it to “Ms. Jane Doe & Guest” so they know they can bring someone.

Post # 4
8471 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

@VioletSky:  Exactly.

Post # 5
3078 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

One of my groomsmen lives with his mom and sister.  I sent him his own invitation and the mom/sister a seperate one.

Post # 6
735 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

The cheat sheet version:

Every “social unit” gets their own invitation, at their own address, and is invited by their own name.

Social unit – a married couple, an engaged couple or a cohabitating couple (and any children under 18 who live with the adult)

Own address – where they live/the address that they get their personal mail (& bills!)

Own name – “John Smith” not “and Guest”

So if there is one house with a parent and two adult children you would send three invitations to that house.

If you want to invite your friend Jane Brown, and you’d like to extend an invitation to a gentleman of her choosing to accompany her you’d call Jane and ask “Hey Jane, I’m putting together my guest list.  Is there someone special in your life who you’d like to bring to the wedding?”  And when she tells you “yes, his name is John Smith.” Get the proper spelling and address from Jane and mail an invitation to John’s house.  If you hardly know John, and you think he might not know who is getting married without an explaination from Jane, you can mail his inviation to Jane’s house – but it should still be his OWN invitation addressed to John Smith, c/o Jane Brown.

If you already know John (and perhaps know that he’s dating Jane) you might not need to get his address from Jane; but he should still get his own invitation at his house and Jane would get her invitation at her house.


Post # 7
10453 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2014

I’d just send 1. 

Post # 10
6741 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2014

@aggie2010:  Can’t you do 2 lines for the names to get it to fit on the address label?  Or shrink the font?


Tom Smith, Jane Jones
and Sue Smith
1234 Wedding Bliss
White Dress, WB 12345


Personally, I’m all about saving money and I don’t think each person in one household needs their own invite.  I’m 28, live with my parents, and so I still get invited under their invites.  I think it’s best so be frugal and try to keep things to 1 invite per address, if possible.  Just my opinion!

Post # 11
2055 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Can you write their names on different lines?

Jane Jones
Tom Smith
Sue Smith
5 MainStreet
pleasantville, tx 90210

Post # 12
2055 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Oops someone already suggested that while I was typing!

Post # 14
2055 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@aggie2010:  I hear you! One of my friends who lives in England sent me his address and its 6 lines long.  It drove me nuts and made me rework my whole spreadsheet =T

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