(Closed) Groomsmen DRAMA

posted 5 years ago in Grooms/men
Post # 2
Member
217 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

Wait, I don’t know if I understand. He is a groomsman in two ceremonies but you’re only invited to one ceremony? If that is the case I think it’s a tacky thing to do to your brother but it’s not like he won’t know other people at the ceremony you aren’t invited to. I get his feelings about the whole thing but it would just cause family drama if he refused.

Post # 3
Member
280 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2016

why aren’t you invited to your FI’s brother’s wedding? That is strange to me. 

Post # 5
Member
1770 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

I would say, since you guys are engaged, that he make it known that he will not be attending without you.

Post # 6
Member
5153 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2014

View original reply
sumshine.dawn:  “Thank you for the invite but I do not feel comfortable attending without my future wife. If you’d like to work things out between us, please let us know – we are open to discussing our differences and putting them aside. Best wishes”

Havent you made other posts about your Future Brother-In-Law and FSIL? At this point, if there’s still drama, you guys need to step back and leave it alone until they come around. And if they don’t, be civil. 

  • This reply was modified 5 years, 2 months ago by  .
Post # 7
Member
1288 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

 

View original reply
sumshine.dawn:  Not quite following, but just because the bride doesn’t like you doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be invited. Espeically since you’re now engaged.

I hate, LITERALLY hate my sisters boyfriend. I wish he would leave forever and that I’d never see him again. BUT because he is with my sister, and I respect her, his dumbass is invited to my wedding. If he wasn’t, I guarantee she wouldn’t stand up as my Maid/Matron of Honor, let alone show up to the wedding.

Post # 9
Member
78 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: January 2017

Wow that’s really tough.. It’s very difficult to make everyone happy. And I’m so sorry that this has to weigh down the excitement of your recent engagement!

If your Fiance has already decided that he doesn’t want to be a groomsman, then he should just politely refuse. Even if he really just wants to say “Hell no!”, he should be the bigger person and just say “Hey, I appreciate that you want me to be a part of your special day but I really don’t feel comfortable taking that position and I don’t feel like I’d be able to be the groomsman you’d want me to be.”

I don’t know if I would suggest that your Fiance not show up to the wedding at all considering this is his family and it would hurt his dad. But your Fiance needs to make it very clear that he is upset and hurt that his brother would consider him important enough to make him a groomsman but not important enough to consider the person he loves. Again, your Fiance should be polite about this otherwise it’ll make the situation worse.

As far as dealing with the bride, she sounds very immature. I’m sure no matter what you do, she’ll find some way to start drama. So I think the best thing for you to do is to be the bigger person and when its all said and done, at least you know you weren’t the crazy one. Ha!

Post # 12
Member
1288 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

 

View original reply
sumshine.dawn:  Here’s the thing with wedding parties… you can ask someone to stand by your side. Not demand it. Let him be the family “douche” and when family asks why he wasn’t there, he can say his brothers wife wouldn’t allow you to come. Then he’ll no longer be the family douche, and she’ll be the family bitch.

Post # 13
Member
78 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: January 2017

Why would they even have two ceremonies.. on opposite sides of the US..? Is it because her family is from Miami so she feels like it’s more of HER wedding and she doesn’t want you to go to that one? Sorry.. She just sounds a little silly and over-the-top to me.

You could also add the fact that your Fiance has to fly back and forth to so many places and it would be a financial burden so he decided that he will attend one with you and that’s that.

Post # 15
Member
784 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

“And FI’s brother said he was 90% sure that she was going to agree to let me come to the miami wedding until my Fiance proposed to me.”

 

These people never made it past 3rd grade. What sort of silly mind game is that? 90%? Seriously? These people call themselves adults?? “going to agree to let” – AGREE? LET? Yeesh.

 

That’s all I have to add. PPs gave great suggestions. Fiance only goes where you go, if at all. It’s ridiculous to not invite you. You Fiance is well within his rights to civilly decline to attend a wedding where his fiance is not invited, and that’s the end of it. They can pitch a fit all they want, but sometimes, with toddlers, you just have to let them scream it out. 

The topic ‘Groomsmen DRAMA’ is closed to new replies.

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