(Closed) Groomzilla!

posted 6 years ago in Grooms/men
Post # 3
Member
642 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

My Fiance doesnt have much interest, but if he did I would tell him to back the f*** off lol 

I could only imagine the fights we would get in lol

Post # 4
Member
2437 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@JBtimestwo:  My FH was the same way when we first started planning, it wore off quickly.  He now tells me “whatever you want, babe” :). haha

Post # 5
Hostess
7560 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2013

Oh no! Can you give us an example? 

Post # 6
Member
3078 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@JBtimestwo:  “I feel like I have lost control of what is supposed to be “my day.””


For the record it’s both of your day.

Have you tried to have a talk with him about it?  I think it’s great that he’s interested and involved.  Maybe you can find a happy medium.

Post # 8
Member
404 posts
Helper bee

Very much agree with @Brideonabudgetlauren, It’s not just about you, you need to make this day about the both of you! Though importantly not about his family, it’s not their day.

Post # 9
Member
7647 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

First, get out of the “my day” midset. It is just as much his day as yours.

Second, he needs to be discussing opinions with you. He can ask his family, that doesn’t mean he has to use the opinions they give. If he is just going out and making decisions without talking to you first then you need to have a serious conversation with him. You need to be in this together.

 

Post # 11
Member
3569 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Wow if this is your day then why even invite him??? lol

Seriously it’s his wedding too, he doesn’t get to be a dictator neither do you. I don’t think you can banish him from his own wedding.

You guys need to tell family members to but out and then you compromise and make choices together. Sometimes that means agreeing to disagree letting him win on things he feels more strongly then you do, and he letting you win on things you feel more strongly then he does. If nothing else it will you guys practice and  encourage clear communication and making joint decisions together as a couple.

Post # 12
Member
404 posts
Helper bee

Okay, that is kinda unreasonable, though could he be trying to help you/surprise you? You need to make him see that these decisions are about the both of you, if you don’t want him to make any decisions alone.

Sounds to me like he’s getting a bit bullied (maybe not quite the right word) by the women in his family! How is he with them? Is he close to his family? Does he go to them a lot for stuff? (Basically I’m asking if he’s a momma’s boy in a nice way…)

Post # 16
Member
817 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2013 - Mansion House at the MD Zoo

Why not split up sepcific responsibilities? Not the venue because that’s important but stuff like you find a DJ/band, I’ll talk to florists, we can each research 3 caterers and narrow down choices then pick together. You figure out girls’ clothes and gifts, he does the guys. Etc etc. (I would narrow down a color scheme first.) Or you split up what to research (there are, IE 97 milllion photographers out there) then you present your top 3 or 4 in each category and decide together. Use family as tiebreakers only.

That way everyone is involved and has input and you’re not running around in circles or duuplicating stuff. 10 months out means you want to line up vendors pretty quickly, even if you have time to work on details.

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