(Closed) Grrr: Mini-vent on people visiting (or not when they said they would)!

posted 8 years ago in Home
Post # 3
624 posts
Busy bee

If it’s someone who continuely calls and says they will come by and then doesn’t, I would stop going out of my way for them.  Harsh but it’s annoying as heck when you bust your butt for someone and they blow you off. 


Post # 4
2015 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

Umm, that would tick me off to no end! I’m very, well, let’s say anal, about these kinds of things (plans, arrangements, etc.). If you’re not showing up, call me and at least tell me!

That’s so rude. I would start telling people, “if you change your plans, please let me know, just because I usually have to shift my work schedule around and such.” If it still keeps happening, I would just stop being such a gracious host.

Post # 6
5823 posts
Bee Keeper

I think you and your Fiance need to be clear with these would-be guests that you are rearranging you life to accomodate them.  If they ask if it will be ok if they can drop by on Thursday say something like “Sure, that will be great!  I’ll have hosrs d’oeuvres and drinks ready for you.  And please make sure to give us a phone call when you are on your way because I’m trading shifts to be open that night!”  It lets them know that you are making time for them (they are important) AND not to flake out (because it would inconvenience you!).

What a crappy thing to do to you, I’m sorry!  Frown

Post # 7
1482 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

Aww… that is annoying 🙁  You sound like you are a great hostess, and I would be irritated too if I went to all that trouble and people didn’t even bother to let me know they weren’t coming.  It’s one thing to do it once and forget to call, but quite another thing if people are habitually doing that to you.  I think that warrents a conversation the next time they ask to “stop by” during which you or FH tell them that while you would love to see them, you want to make sure they are actually coming because you will be changing your work schedule, etc.  I’m sure there is a tactful way to put that 🙂

In the meantime, I think you should applaud yourself on being such a gracious hostess- it is a skill that I am still working on, and I admire anyone to whom it comes naturally. 🙂

Post # 8
1230 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I would be super annoyed if I were in your situation. I definitely agree with Mightysapphire, you should let people know how much time and effort you put into hosting them and to let you know if they are unable to come. Maybe people figure you wouldn’t do much if they are “just stopping by”. By letting them know, they would understand how much of an inconvenience it is to you that they don’t show up and don’t call you to let you know. 

Post # 9
5966 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

Flakiness is a major pet peeve of mine.  That’s really inconsiderate, I’m sorry!  

The topic ‘Grrr: Mini-vent on people visiting (or not when they said they would)!’ is closed to new replies.

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