- 4 years ago
This is my first post-and I am in need of some serious advice! I am dealing with, as I’ve dubed it, a grumpy bridesmaid. This particular maid has been/was one of my best friends. We attended college together and went through a lot. Since graduating and moving to the same city, our friendship has stayed strong until I briefly moved. Upon returning to the same city, we’ve had our ups and downs. We know each other extremely well and it is hard not to call each other out on things. Over the past two years our friendship has started to decline, but I felt the need to include her in our wedding. This was something I wavered about, but utimately felt like it would be worse if I did not include her. After asking her to stand with me, with an entusiastic reply I felt good. I informed her that I’d love for her to help me with caligraphy when the time comes and to hold tight for details and decision making. We started making plans, and she’d actually follow through, and I felt like our friendship was on the right track-until dress shopping. Here is where I dubbed her the grumpy bridesmaid and it has stayed that way. She was uncomfortable in everything, unhappy with everything and self-consious about how she was going to look on our big day. Mind you, I told all the maids (there are only 3 of them including her) they could choose whatever dress they’d like as long as it was the same color and fabric. In addition to the dress drama, she has been avoiding me, making plans and canceling, not following through with emails sent by my Maid/Matron of Honor or myself and in social situations has been hostile, unresponsive, snippy and uncomfortably awkward. We’re 3 months out until the big day, she has not tried her dress on (she’s had it since June) and has no idea when or how she’ll be traveling to the wedding. Over a year ago she had confined in me she was jealous (before my fiance and I were engaged) of where I was in my life, is she still just that jealous? Not only am I balancing family requests, wedding planning, a full-time job and social life, this is stressing me out to the max. I feel like I am losing a friend just because I am getting married and she’s not. Do I “fire” her as a bridesmaid, or suck it up and deal, knowing I’ve lost a friend through this process?