Post # 1
Anyone else have this problem???
First, my fh’s friend rsvpd “no” to our wedding. Then he changed his mind and rsvpd “yes, with his wife”. So I went ahead and added 2 additional guests and paid for their meals, all to make my fh happy. Now, not only do I have to pay for them, but they are planning on making it a family vacation- bringing their 2 teenagers and brother. I told fh, we are not paying for another 3 meals, especially @ $160 pp, and I have never even met these 3 additional people.
Second, after venting to everyone (friends and family), one of my close friends tells me that she invited her brother. He is coming along for the “vacation” part, but knows he is not going to be able to attend our ceremony or reception. Great, I am glad she at least informed him. However, this is the issue. My aunt was nice enough to pay for the hotel rooms for my friends as our wedding gift. This female friend is scheduled to share a room with two other female friends. Now, that she wants to bring her brother, he is plannign on tagging along and sharing the room. It is creatign all kinds of drama between friends- no one wants to share a room with a guy, and I completely understand! How do I tell her that he needs to book his own room without really offending her?
Post # 3
All you need to do is be upfront and honest about each of the situations. Deciding which people to invite and who doesn’t get to go is always a touchy subject. Sometimes you have to accept that some people may or may not get offended.
With FH’s friend, you can kindly tell them the invitation was only extended to him and his wife and that you cannot afford to accomodate their teenagers and brother b/c your budget is limited. The teenagers are old enough to take care of themselves for a night and it should not be a big deal if they get left home. I hardly ever got invited my parents friend’s weddings, my brother and I just hung out at home and took care of ourselves.
Same goes for the friend. It would be really awkward for a bunch of girls to share a hotel room with a guy that they don’t really know. Simply let her know that the rooms were intended to be ‘girls only” and if he wants to come, he can book his own room and possibly bring a friend to hang out with him to keep him company.
Post # 4
Thanks for the advice- I will definitely let my friend know it is a girls only room. Great idea. I’m just wondering if she is going to ask if he can stay with they guys that also have a room. Maybe I will let her know that there already will be a few guys in the room, and most likely he will have to sleep on the floor or he can book his own room.
I’m so bothered by the first issue. My fh has told them that we can only afford their 2 meals. We even talked about the costs in front of them, on purpose, to see if they would get the hint. I was trying to not let it bother me, but then I saw recent comments that the wife posted on fh’s FB page. All regarding attending the wedding, and the family is excited, blah blah blah…
Post # 5
I’m going to close this thread and refer people to the other thread with more comments. It gets too confusing to follow multiples of the same subject!
Guests inviting Guests to our small destination wedding