Post # 1
I’m freshly engaged and running head first into my first hurdle: THE GUEST LIST! I started out with a list of 140 people and hoped to have a huge shindig for all to enjoy. After reviewing venues and costs, reality struck and now I’ve trimmed my list to just over a 100 folks (not including guests).
I ask of you, gentle readers, what’s an average size guest list? How did you choose who made the cut? Did you go through crazy stress with creating your list and how did you handle it?
Any and all advice, suggestions & comments are appreciated!
Post # 3
The guest list was actually the hardest thing for me. I have a large family. We started by making a “wish list” of people who could be invited (family, friends, coworkers, plus 1s, etc), then went from there. When we had a venue, we knew the number we had to be at, and we just kept cutting.
We are having about 170 people at the wedding, and that’s cut from well over 200.
Post # 4
@Bhotel21: we’re invited 120, aiming for 100
frankly on my side i knew very very few people would be able to make it (i am from london but living and getting married in mexico), so it wasnt hard to make a list!
fi invited immediate family, friends and co-workers, but he happily could have filled a wedding with 300 people if i didnt mind a big wedding – he knows a LOT of people
Post # 5
I’m also freshly engaged, looking to get married next year, and in a conundrum about the guest list! It feels horrible to set a concrete limit – I know I’ll end up excluding good friends because I have to invite all my cousins/aunts/uncles (who I know well, and couldn’t not invite, but I’m not as close to as my girlfriends!).
I know this has been frowned upon here before, but I’m having a huge engagement party but won’t invite some of those people to the actual wedding. I’m also playing with the idea of inviting some people to the ceremony but not the reception. I think these practices are more common in Australia than the US – I’ve seen a number of weddings/engagements like this – and to me it seems like an ok compromise to still include people in my celebrations, but not either (a) break the bank or (b) have a lacklustre wedding with too many people.
Post # 6
We were hoping for 80 and our guest list is at about 105. In order to have the people we really love at our wedding we’ve opted not to allow our invited guests to bring a guest (we’ve included significant others and children on our guest list so anyone in a relationship has their fam with them). It’s really helped to keep our list small.
Post # 7
200 guests on my list right now. It’s family and close friends. It was originally 250, but I trimmed it down as much as I could.
Post # 8
We booked the smallest rom at our venue, so we knew our maximum number of people was 125 (this way fiances mother could not invite everyone she knew). We are still tweaking the guest list and seeing who should bring as guest, but it will probably be close to that number.
Post # 9
We knew we wanted a small wedding, so it is just immediate family and closest friends. We’ve invited 63 people (which includes children) and I’m expecting that we have around 45-50 people.
Post # 10
we wanted a small wedding so we invited all immediate family (brothers sisters mums and dads) and then we got 3 sets of friends each. that brought the total to 38. we then extended it and a few more close family peeps, a couple more friends and its now 60 with no children, Im expecting 50.
Post # 11
I’m going to go ahead and revive this old thread.
We started with 40 invited, and it has more than tripled to 126 invited. The funny thing is for the most part I’m not upset about the added guests. I’m trying to go with the flow. It’s wonderful that so many people want to celebrate with us (more like our parents want to invite so many people)
Although we have a huge number of people invited, there are only 1 or 2 who I wish I had the option not to invite. It’s not that I don’t want them to come, it’s just that I would have held off sending them a save the date so I could put off the decision to invite them. So I think out of so many people, I am enthusiastic for about 90% of them. That’s pretty good!
Our guest list was broken out pretty evenly I think:
Post # 12
We cut our guest list big time and if anyone asks we just say its nothing personal and its strictly financial since we are footing the bill ourselves…our dream guest list was over 200 people… we invited 110 and are hoping it ends up around 85….Fingers crossed our RSVPS are DUE back by wednesday!!
Post # 13
I’ve been trying to guess what the take up will be. Please can you let us know how many accepted?
We were aiming for about 80 all day guests (close friends and family for the ceremoney and sit down meal) then up to 200 for the evening reception (basically everyone we know and a hog roast!). But the day time guest list is currently around 83 and both Mum’s are keen to add more. It may get up to 100.
Now if i could gaurentee only 80% take up that would be great. Everyone is invited, even if they cant make it.
Then I have the first big disagreement with my fiance about the wedding so far. I would like to invite kids, he would like to exclude kids. If I get my way that does add another 15-20 to the list.
Honestly, the guest list is the WORST thing about wedding planning.
Post # 14
@LilLis: I’m now in semi-panic mode…our 110 guest list, 87 are coming and i’m still missing like 10 rsvps!! hopefully they are all nos b/c i can justify a few over my original hope for 85 people since we have several small children attending but i’m panicing im going to have to pay more when all of our payments have been made!!
Post # 15
@mra0328: Eeek. I hope that all the people who havent replied are the ones you only invited because you thought you should then! And that they are all booked on exciting hoidays so cant make it!
Thanks for letting us know.
Our aim for 80 has resulted in a guest list of 100. So maybe we will get lucky and have about 80 positives.
Post # 16
At this stage, I am thinking around 120, the Fiance is thinking 30. LOL I am guessing we will end up with around 75, depending on the venue.