(Closed) Guest List…….

posted 9 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
1092 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I would say DHs and FIs should be invited. Boyfriends, not so much (maybe unless they live together and/or have been dating a significant amount of time).

Make sure to be consistent though, to avoid hurt feelings. Like, if you’re not allowing someone to bring their boyfriend, make sure you’re not allowing any boyfriends to come.

Post # 4
95 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Ooh that is tough. I think it’s proper etiquette to invite the SO’s of your friends..unless you have a blanket rule of “no plus ones” or “no plus ones except family”. Or be prepared for your friends to reply no…which would maybe be a best case scenario anyway.

Otherwise I guess you could tell your friends you’re keeping it really small… But if it’s not a small wedding or if it would be obvious that other friends got to bring their SO’s then it could rub your friends the wrong way. Maybe consider keeping it more intimate and not inviting these friends if you think their company will ruin your day. I think a wedding is too important to have people there who make you uncomfortable, unless it’s family, everyone will probably get over it.

Post # 5
2104 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

If they change boyfriends or girlfriends every other week, I think it’s okay to not invite the +1’s.  But if they’ve been together for a few months or longer, I think they’re considered a social unit at that point.  Remember back to when you had been dating your Fiance for a few months… you’d have preferred to have him invited along with you, as well.

Post # 6
213 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I agree if they are married or have been together for years they should get the +1 ( even if you don’t particulary care for the partner). I have a few relatives that I have never met their new partner but they were invited anyway ( and we are having a small wedding)

Post # 7
2849 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Definitely invite husbands, fiance’s and cohabitors. I think it’s also nice to invite people who have been together for a year or longer. 

Post # 8
3120 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I think you just need to have a blanket rule.  “No ring, no +1” or something along those lines.

Post # 9
2353 posts
Buzzing bee

Most people, I think, invite spouses, fiances, cohabitants, and people together for more than a year. You might want to set the rule more narrowly (only spouses, fiances, cohabitants), or more broadly (anyone together 6 months or more), etc. Whatever you do, choose a rule and then stick to it. You will be bombarded with pleas for exceptions. 

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