(Closed) Guest List drama… rant!

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
242 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

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ChrissyMary9515:  It would bother me. My DH and I paid for the majority of our wedding – with my parents paying for my dress and his parents paying for the church and each side paying for a few extra guests. The package we paid for from our venue stated a minimum of 100 guest (any extra guests over 100 we had to pay extra for them on top of what we were already paying). Right off the bat my family got 50 spots and so did his (this was to include family, friends and people each set of parents wanted to invite). Both sets of parents knew that if their guest list went over 50 they – not my DH and myself – had to pay for the extra people. They both did go over the number but not by much – we ended up with a 110 people showing up at the wedding. Could you maybe tell your inlaws that each side has x amount of spots and each side has to pay for the extra guests?

  • This reply was modified 5 years, 6 months ago by  Brokensound21.
Post # 3
3064 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

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ChrissyMary9515:  I would be FURIOUS with your Fiance for not sticking up for you. Wow. Are his parents planning on giving you a large gift or something? This would infuriate me. 

Who actually sent them the STD? The thing to do would have been for you to get on the same page as you and just tell them no, sorry, these randoms cannot come. 

However its too late so the best you can do is hope that they RSVP NO so you can invite the other guests you had to cut. 

I would sit down and talk to your Fiance. Does he have issues cutting the cord to his parents? Unbelievable. 

From this point forward work on setting some actual boundaries with your inlaws regarding the wedding, and get your Fiance on the same page as you!!!

Post # 4
963 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2015 - On a Cliff Overlooking the Bay, Florida


ChrissyMary9515:  It would bothrer me because i am kinda in the same boat. But my invitation already went out. My mom gave us money, His parent gave us money and we pitched in the rest so about 1/3 each. We got everyones guest list, and Save the Dates went out a long time ago and invitation went out 2 weeks ago as I have 75 days left….. Well my mom calls me yesterday and says she invited 5 more people (which means 10) and to send them an invitation because they have already verbally accepted……..i’m already over our max by 5 people right now waiting for the official declines so i cna be within our max guest limit. How do i tell my mom Sorry too late??

Post # 5
6367 posts
Bee Keeper

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ChrissyMary9515:  yes, it would bother me, and I would be furious with my OH for allowing it to happen. I would have put my foot down and said the list was final, and IF I was OK with there being strangers there, I might suggest that if they foot the bill, they can invite them. That would be the ONLY way I would have considered it. 

What’s done is done though so you’re just going to have to move on. I do think though that if you have the space, you should invite the people your parents had to cut with your Fiance footing the bill. 

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