- 10 years ago
- Wedding: June 2012
I know this is something that has been beaten to death on these boards but I am honestly stuck as to what I and Fiance should do.
Let me preface this by saying Future Mother-In-Law and I get along super well. Like UNATURALLY WELL, we text everyday and joke around. That being said, I do have a problem.
We are having our wedding and reception at my aunt and uncle’s house. It is a large character home here in SK, well known to locals and it is a fair sized house. My aunt wants me to finalize the guest list right away and send it to her so that she knows how many people she’ll be having in her home, fair enough obviously. Problem is I can’t finalize it because we have a couple of problems on Fiance side.
Future Mother-In-Law and her brother DO NOT GET ALONG. I have never met FI’s uncle but honest she has forward me e-mails from him that are kind of insane. Currently, there is some drama involving their parents wills (I would like to add that FI’s grandparents AREN’T DEAD) and I have told Future Mother-In-Law that Fiance and I do not care as I am a firm believe people are allow to do whatever they want with their money. Anyways, I guess this has caused some back and forth fighting.
Future Mother-In-Law has said that she does not want her brother there and that he does not deserve to be invited. She will say things to me like “You know G* has said awful and hateful things about you and Fiance.” And honestly, this would be find not inviting him if it weren’t for two factors.
1) She has already told her niece (G* daughter) that she is invited. (Thanks for that Future Mother-In-Law as I AND Fiance ARE PAYING FOR THE WEDDING) and she wants to invite G* ex wife (niece’s mother) to the wedding.
* By the way I am super annoyed that Future Mother-In-Law has been inviting people verbally. She asked me if she should be inviting people verbally and of course I said NO! But apparently she has already invited a couple of people verbally…sigh…
2) She wants her parents (FI’s gparents) there. Which is fine. They are obviously important in FI’s life.
I PERSONALLY feel that if this niece (who I have also never met is invited) and her mother who has never been involved overly in FI’s life are invited, so should be G* has I have never seen any evidence that he has said/done rude things towards Fiance and I other than being told he is “steal” “our” inheritance. Uhuh. Also if FI’s grand parents are invited it would look super rude to not to invite G* there and I do not want to make enemies of them because I haven’t met them either.
I have already told Fiance that he needs to talk to his mom about this because I haven’t met these people and she seems to think this is ok.
I really need to get this finalized for my aunt as she really wants a number soonish.
So I guess these are my questions:
1) What should we do?
2) Am I out of line for feeling that the niece and mom shouldn’t be invited if G* isn’t?
3) Should Fiance ask who she has invited verbally or just drop it at this point?