(Closed) Guest List Help Needed! Internal moral fight brewing!

posted 10 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
7975 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

I think you should invite them, because you sent them Save-The-Date Cards and you may want to salvage the friendships in the future. Realistically, people who can’t make time for you now aren’t going to spend the money to go to HI anyway, so they’ll most likely RSVP no and you’ll get to be polite but won’t have to have them at your wedding.

If you don’t invite them, you’re basically shutting the door on the friendship, and not giving them any chance to pursue you in the future.

Post # 4
375 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I would invite them. If your friendships have truly grown apart as you said, then they probably won’t fly to HI anyway… if the do choose to go, perhaps it will signal a renewal in the friendship. 

Plus, not giving them and invite after sending the Save-The-Date Cards would, from my POV, really kill the friendships for good. 


Post # 5
792 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I agree with the other posters, unless you’ve really had a falling out with these people, you should invite them.

Post # 6
875 posts
Busy bee

YES, you need to invite them!  In the last three months, I have been busy with about a zillion things!  I have been in and out of towns of people that I loved and haven’t had a chance to get together with them every time.  Summer can be a crazy time, so I wouldn’t be offended that you haven’t heard or seen them in this amount of time.  I stopped in a town that a college friend lives in to stay overnight at a hotel, see a show at a theater, and go on my way …to the shore.  I didn’t have time to get together with her, because it was the kind of thing that was a whirlwind trip!  She wasn’t offended, and I wouldn’t have been either!  You have to remember that friends are friends even if they don’t stop by or call everyday!

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