(Closed) Guest list uneven friends family ratio?

posted 6 years ago in Reception
Post # 2
30400 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

View original reply
vivi2:  If you send out invitations to friends at the same time as the invitations to family, and the timing is the standard time frame for mailing invitations, there is no reason for anyone to think they are on the “B” list.

There is no one fair way to share the invitations amongst family and friends. Each couple has to do what’s right for them.

Post # 3
1281 posts
Bumble bee

We were in a similar situation. We said ‘family only’ then realised we had space so we thought we’d have a few close friends. We now have about 90% family 10% friends. No one will think anything of it if you just say its family and close friends only, and make sure to send invites out at the same time. 

Post # 4
931 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I don’t see why it’s a big deal that it isn’t evenly split…  It’s not like the chances would be in your favor to marry a man that has a family of the exact same size as you.

Post # 5
15 posts

If anything, I would feel very special as a friend knowing that I was invited to a “family only” wedding. If someone mentions it you can always reply that they are practically family to you, so of course you want them to come celebrate your big day!

My Fiance has a gigantic family that all live in the same state as we do, whereas my family is tiny and out of state. I will have more friends at the wedding than he will, but that isn’t a problem to us.

Post # 6
452 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

We just picked a total number of people and split it in half… 

Turns out i have a huge family compared to his and i have no friends and he has heaps. There’s no one else i would want there on the day and he says the same. 

Post # 7
940 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2015

I don’t think it would be a problem for the newly-invited guests, but I wouldn’t do it. I can’t imagine saying that your best friends will be there while none of your fiancé’s best friends are invited, even if he does have more siblings/aunts/whatever.

Post # 8
33 posts
  • Wedding: March 2016

I don’t think you should add people to the wedding just to make it a 50/50 split. My Fiance comes from a very small family, and is only inviting about 30 family members. I, on the other hand, come form a huge family and have about 180 on the guest list. I do not think it is fair to invite the bride’s friends but now allow the groom to invite any. As long as the ones who are important to you are there it should not matter if it is a 50/50 split.

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