Post # 1
We want to have an intimate wedding reception and are trying to keep things small so I’ve been telling friends it will be just immediate family. What we now realize is the groom side has much more family and the list would be 70% groom, 30% bride. Would it be weird to make it 50/50 by inviting some close friends on the bride side if the groom is not inviting friends? and if it’s not weird, would those friends feel like “b-list” invites since I already told people it was for immediate family? I wouldn’t want them to think they’re getting an invite because I had family who declined.
Post # 2
If you send out invitations to friends at the same time as the invitations to family, and the timing is the standard time frame for mailing invitations, there is no reason for anyone to think they are on the “B” list.
There is no one fair way to share the invitations amongst family and friends. Each couple has to do what’s right for them.
Post # 3
We were in a similar situation. We said ‘family only’ then realised we had space so we thought we’d have a few close friends. We now have about 90% family 10% friends. No one will think anything of it if you just say its family and close friends only, and make sure to send invites out at the same time.
Post # 4
I don’t see why it’s a big deal that it isn’t evenly split… It’s not like the chances would be in your favor to marry a man that has a family of the exact same size as you.
Post # 5
If anything, I would feel very special as a friend knowing that I was invited to a “family only” wedding. If someone mentions it you can always reply that they are practically family to you, so of course you want them to come celebrate your big day!
My Fiance has a gigantic family that all live in the same state as we do, whereas my family is tiny and out of state. I will have more friends at the wedding than he will, but that isn’t a problem to us.
Post # 6
We just picked a total number of people and split it in half…
Turns out i have a huge family compared to his and i have no friends and he has heaps. There’s no one else i would want there on the day and he says the same.
Post # 7
I don’t think it would be a problem for the newly-invited guests, but I wouldn’t do it. I can’t imagine saying that your best friends will be there while none of your fiancé’s best friends are invited, even if he does have more siblings/aunts/whatever.
Post # 8
I don’t think you should add people to the wedding just to make it a 50/50 split. My Fiance comes from a very small family, and is only inviting about 30 family members. I, on the other hand, come form a huge family and have about 180 on the guest list. I do not think it is fair to invite the bride’s friends but now allow the groom to invite any. As long as the ones who are important to you are there it should not matter if it is a 50/50 split.