(Closed) Guest list woes

posted 8 years ago in Logistics
Post # 3
18637 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

I wouldn’t invite them if you or your parents aren’t still close with them.  You have to draw a line somewhere!

Post # 4
1940 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I would divide up the guest list – figure out the total number of people who will be invited (ex. 200 people) and then divide it between the different groups of people.


  • Bride and Groom – 60 invites
  • Bride’s parents –  70 invites (including all relatives)
  • Groom’s parents – 70 invites (including all relatives)

Then each set of parents will have to decide who they would like to invite (but sticking to the numbers you provided as a guide).

Post # 5
435 posts
Helper bee

No, you don’t have to invite them.  I think it was kind of rude of them to have asked.  If they are good friends of your grandparents and they would like to invite them that might be a different situation…if your are open to it and can afford to do so.

Post # 6
950 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I second @EvaBostonTerrier, it’s exactly what we did.  By giving our parents the freedom to choose their invitees, but limiting the number, we eliminated hurt feelings (of our parents) & arguments & passed the buck of cutting people to them.

Post # 8
58 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

i will never never never understand people asking if they are invited. so weird.

Post # 9
2344 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

We only invited about 1/3 of our church. There are a few that ask about the wedding with this sort of expectant tone, and it has been hard on my mom. She usually changes the subject, or mentions that we are having a small wedding with mostly family. It’s helped me to tell people how huge our families are – when they hear that we invited over 200 family members, they are like, “Oh wow!” and definitely don’t ask for an invite then!

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