Guest Standing During The Ceremony? POLL

posted 3 months ago in Ceremony
  • poll: How long would you be willing to stand for a ceremony?
    No more than 20 minutes : (11 votes)
    6 %
    No more than 15 minutes : (12 votes)
    7 %
    Seat for everyone would be best : (145 votes)
    85 %
    You're overthinking it because you're two weeks out :) : (3 votes)
    2 %
  • Post # 2
    2521 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: July 2018

    I’ve seen posts like this on the Bee before. Everyone universally hates it. People show up early to a wedding as one does to be polite, and so you have people standing in heels for at least 30 minutes, thinking about how much this sucks and their feet hurt and they want to sit down, instead of thinking about you and your wonderful marriage. 

    Best to avoid it. 

    Post # 3
    7022 posts
    Busy Beekeeper

    No. Why don’t you have seats for everyone? How did this “snag” come up? Seating for only half your guests is incredibly rude, and obviously ill prepared. And it sounds like you won’t have enough seating for everyone at your cocktail reception either? Honestly you are coming off like a really bad host with a plan that wasn’t thought out well. 

    Keep in mind your 20m ceremony is more like 30-45m for guests who arrive early. And that’s if you’re actually on time, many weddings don’t start exactly on time (though I would make sure yours does!). 

    Post # 4
    6856 posts
    Busy Beekeeper

    Yes, it is wildly unusual, and for a reason. A guest who has arrived 15 minutes before your start time will be standing for a solid 40 minutes with a 20 minute ceremony, assuming you start exactly on time. Standing in one place in heels is not the same as mingling/walking/moving around. I am healthy, I hike, I climb, I lift, I walk distances in heels just fine, but just standing in heels for any period of time makes me absolutely miserable. Don’t make the lack of seating be what people remember about your wedding.

    Post # 5
    832 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: February 2018 - UK

    I agree with the PPs. I’ve been to a wedding where most of the guests had to stand. It’s been years, but I can still remember that I spent the whole ceremony shifting from foot to foot whilst trying not to cause a distraction, because my feet were killing me in the heels. 

    People will probably be too polite to complain to your face, but they’ll definitely be uncomfortable. Especially combined with the standing reception.

    Post # 6
    3823 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: November 2019 - City, State

    frenchtoastvegan :  EEEK, It’s coming so quickly!!! 

    I’d say if your reception was a seated dinner, standing for the ceremony wouldn’t be a big deal. But because the majority of the event will be standing, I would try to find a way to seat everyone. What happened that this snag arose?


    Post # 8
    1020 posts
    Bumble bee

    frenchtoastvegan :  There’s nothing to LOL about.


    It’s rude. And uncomfortable.  Rent more chairs.  And PLEASE have a place for everyone at the reception. It’s fine to have a cocktail-style reception, but your guests need a place to put their handbags/coats/wraps so they’re not juggling that all night with a wine glass and a plate. 

    Post # 9
    34 posts
    • Wedding: August 2020

    Can you rent chairs? Even just a few dozen?


    Having everyone stand up also can block their view fo the ceremony. Guests will be uncomforable, possibly fidgeing around. I hope you don’t have children attending the ceremony….they will be moving around and causing a distraction. 


    If I were you I’d whip out my credit card and rent some chairs. 



    Post # 12
    958 posts
    Busy bee

    I went to a wedding where we had to stand outside during the ~15 min ceremony (I’m pretty sure it was a last-minute snafu; the chairs just didn’t show up)…it wasn’t ideal, and I’d probably side-eye anyone who *plans* a standing ceremony, but it also wasn’t a huge deal (was wearing 3-inch wedge heels). If there’s no other way around it, I’d recommend alerting your guests that standing should be expected for both the ceremony and reception, so they can plan their footwear accordingly. 

    ETA: If you can rent more chairs, you definitely should. If there were budget or space restrictions, you might be able to get away with it, but if you can afford it then there’s no question that seats should be provided for everyone

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