(Closed) guestbook not okay, she wants to be bridesmaid

posted 11 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 32
Member
5398 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Miss Marshmallow: Love your attitude about the situation & I think the decision you made was definately the right one!

Post # 33
Member
31 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2009

I apologize if another comment already says something similar to this, but I have been given the "honor" of handing out programs or asking people to sign the guestbook at three different weddings (2 cousins and a friend of my sister’s) and I would’ve much rather have been a guest. I personally don’t think it’s necessary to have attendants to do those tasks, and I’d rather my friends that aren’t in my bridal party have a good time at the wedding.

Post # 34
Member
27 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2020

I’ve only ever seen the Guest Book scenerio on that Sex and the City episode when Miranda was asked to do the guest book, and she was very offended.  I’m not saying I’ve never attended a wedding where a guest book attendant was utilized, I’ve just never noticed (which may be the point).  I think it’s uneccessary for someone to be standing by the book, therefore I don’t plan to ask anyone to do this at my wedding, plus there’s the stigma attached to it.  A book with a pen should be sufficient I think?  Maybe it’s just the part of the country I’m in.  My nephews will be passing out programs.  I completely agree with Tachee, she probably just wants to be a guest…

On the other hand, who are these girls that WANT to be a bridesmaid?  I’ve always jumped for joy upon hearing I’m not going to be in a bridal party (no matter how dear of a friend). 

Post # 36
Member
13 posts
Newbee

I agree with Miss M., I still don’t get the big deal.  If we all are happy for our good friends, why can’t we all just do a job that requires really minimal work for about 2 hours out of our lives so that they can include us in their wedding and/or make their day go by smoothly?  Personally, I feel honored to be involved in a wedding in any way that I can (and believe me, I’ve done everything, from guestbook, to cake cutting, to playing instruments at the wedding that I hadn’t played in years, to being a bridesmaid and buying the dress that I will barely wear again).  But I think that the important thing to remember is that whoever is asking you is supposed to be your friend, it is HER day, not yours.  That’s the thing that I didn’t like about Alice in your situation, Miss M., that she turned your event and your day around and made it about her.  I think that’s just selfish.   I’m glad it worked out though! 

 PS- I understand that some people are bridezillas and that being in those kinds of weddings stinks.  But I don’t think that being a guestbook attendant should be insulting to people–the bride is just trying to make you involved, not trying to bog you down with an unsavory job, because yeah, a guestbook could totally be left unattended.  Be honored that you have such good friends!

Post # 37
Member
27 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2020

I just think being a guest is the #1 gig. 🙂  My 2 sister’s requested to do the readings as neither of them wanted to be a bridesmaid (they are both in their early 40’s), so I said "Great."   

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