(Closed) Guestlist/Budgeting for DW

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
2104 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

It’s way too hard to ‘get a feel’ for people coming.  Things change constantly… people either can or cannot attend at the last minute.  Honestly, you’ll save yourself a headache if you make a budget first, then make a guest list or a firm number of people, and go from there.  

If 30 people is your max based on your budget, then invite no more than 30.  

Post # 4
Member
2104 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I should also add that setting a firm budget and guest list ahead of time will help you out if/when some of the guests try to bring extra friends or family with them.  It’s a lot easier to tell them you can’t afford any more or there’s no extra space when that’s the truth.  If things aren’t firm beforehand, you might end up getting bullied into adding people you didn’t necessarily want there (or were not high on your priority list).

Post # 5
Member
674 posts
Busy bee

If you want to get married this year and can only afford 30 people, then do as the PP suggested and only invite 30 people. I don’t think you can risk inviting much more than that since your destination isn’t terribly far away. You could have people you didn’t expect to RSVP yes while having others who find out that Atlantic City can actually be pretty pricey to stay in and say no.

If having more people invited is important, then build your guest list, figure our your budget based on it, and save until you can afford it.

If you ask a close friend about the likelihood of attending now, they say yes, and then you find out they can’t make it, you may be more inclined to be upset because you put out these feelers to folks. You may “know” that they aren’t RSVPs to formal invitations, but you’ll probably be pretty annoyed regardless if they thought they could make it and then took up one or two of your invitation list spots.

Post # 6
Member
4130 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2018

There’s always the option of having a “B” list, so as declines come in you can invite others.

Post # 7
Member
3569 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I think because it’s kind of close and not as expensive as a lot of other dw weddings it might be an easy weekend trip for people to plan. I think it’s fine, my friend who did a dw also put feelers out to see if most important family members would be able to swing it and save up for the trip, and of course things could change and people could back out. But I think in your case since it’s closer then a typical destiantion wedding a lot of people would be able to make it.

Post # 8
Member
84 posts
Worker bee

We invited only close close family members and friends. You have to make your guest list and stick to it. My family attempted numerousss times to get me to invite more family and friends and I stuck to my list. It was easier for me to stick to my guns because I wanted a small intimate wedding and wanted to keep cost down while having my dream wedding.

And there will be quite a few people that say they are coming and wont be able too. But bottom line is make a guest list and stick to it, and dont talk about the wedding to people that are not invited, because you will get sucked into inviting them.

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