(Closed) Guests Confused By Save the Dates

posted 4 years ago in Paper
Post # 46
Member
503 posts
Busy bee

Some people just don’t get it. My Future Mother-In-Law thought that we just “pick” a date and send out the STD’s then after a few months find a venue based on the feelers we get if people will travel. 

I plan on sending them regardless. I want a place to use my cute engagment photos 🙂 

Post # 47
Member
907 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

petitebee08:  I had to read that one a few times. Who would do that? Hahaha…

Post # 48
Member
848 posts
Busy bee

I think alot of my family is confused by my save the dates too!  My grandparents are from Mexico and don’t speak alot of English, nor does anyone on that side of the family ever really get married.  My grandpa told my aunt he got my invitation in the mail. lol. She is just going to have me send the actual invite to her and she will rsvp for them. 

Post # 49
Member
503 posts
Busy bee

ironmaidelah:  Yeah. That conversation was a weird one… I was silent after she said that lol 

Post # 50
Member
361 posts
Helper bee

I live in a metropolitan area and go to a few weddings a year and only have received three Save-The-Date Cards.  They aren’t as common as most people think.  Sure on wedding sites it seems like you must send one but I can see people being confused by them, especially older people and especially if it doesn’t specifically say that invitations will follow.

Post # 51
Member
9097 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

I’ve never gotten a save the date. Ever. However if people are truly bewildered, have your SO tell them what it’s for.

Post # 52
Member
9716 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

I’ve never gotten a Save-the-Date for any weddings I’ve attended. If we do decide to send them (which we keep procrastinating on it so I don’t know that we will) it will say “formal invitation to follow” on the bottom to hopefully deter some possible confusion. But it seems kind of pointless to send them since we let all our guests who will need to travel the date as soon as we booked the venue.

I don’t know why your Future Mother-In-Law is making it a big deal though. If anyone really did complain, all she would have to say is “Oh it’s just a save-the-date so that you can make travel arrangements if needed. Invitations will go out in a couple of months with all the information on them.” It’s just not a big deal.

Post # 53
Member
728 posts
Busy bee

I sent save the dates because I have a lot of out of state family but if not for that I probably wouldn’t have. I had a few people tell me “cute invitations” or “thanks for the invite” which was a little annoying because I purposely put on them “formal invitation to follow” to avoid any confusion about that. But even if a few people are confused I think the majority will know what it is and will inform those that don’t. I will say though that I would not spend a lot at all on the save the dates since they aren’t really essential. I spent $100 on them for 100 save the dates & envelopes with our return address preprinted.

Post # 54
Member
85 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

Exact thing happened to me too! lol Probably because it’s not very common in my culture. People looked at our Save-The-Date Cards and was wondering, “uhm.. why is there only one page?” when I clearly stated the invitations are to follow. LOL. 

Post # 55
Member
516 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2016 - Cambridge Mill

SmittenintheMitten:  It’s hard to say, I have received save the dates for about half of the weddings I have been invited too. We did send out a few, simply because our wedding is over a long weekend. Some of my friends were a little confused but it wasn’t a big deal.

Post # 56
Member
1011 posts
Bumble bee

A few months ago, a friend of mine asked me and this other friend of mine for our addresses for Save-The-Date Cards. Well, my other friend received one about 3-4 weeks ago, and I never did. So we’re trying to figure out did a) I do something to make her want to uninvite me (though it wouldn’t be uninviting since I was never invited, but you know what I mean or b) she either have my wrong address/it get lost in the mail/etc or c) did she only send it to out of town guests? We’re wondering c because I’m not the only one who never received one. In her case however, I’m not worried about it, and if I get an invite, I get one. If I don’t, I won’t cry over it. 

I can see it both ways. Older people may be confused about them, but I think the younger generation is generally a little more familiar with them. 

Post # 57
Member
369 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

SmittenintheMitten:  Don’t panick, love. I’m sure Future Mother-In-Law is just being a little dramatic. The good news is that people got their STD notices and are buzzing about the wedding. I’m sure everything will fall into place once the actual invitations go out. Be kind to Future Mother-In-Law, weddings get moms a bit excited. 

Post # 58
Member
515 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2016

I sent Save the Dates because people kept asking me when my wedding date was after I have told them a million times! My one friend was like August something right? Uh yeah, thanks for paying attention. Anyway, no one was confused about our Save the Dates but I had older relatives (my grandmas/grandpas) message/call me and thank me for sending them an invite, all I had to do was tell them it wasn’t an invite and those were coming soon, haha!

Post # 59
Member
659 posts
Busy bee

We put “Formal Invitation to Follow” on ours so I don’t think people were confused. I think Save-The-Date Cards are a newer thing, so just don’t worry about it. I think they are a great and courteous way to let people know so they can plan.

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