(Closed) Guests inviting other guests

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Have you had guests invite a date without asking you?
    Yes : (17 votes)
    50 %
    No : (15 votes)
    44 %
    Yes, they brought one and didn't tell us : (2 votes)
    6 %
  • Post # 3
    1459 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    @june2013bride:  Hm, that is tough. It might be uncomfortable, but I think it’s within your rights to say “the invitation is for you, we’d love for you to be able to attend, but if you can’t we’ll understand”. Maybe some of the etiquitte gurus will have better advice, good luck!

    Post # 4
    1430 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2015

    Maybe I’m just too blunt, but I’d say that the invite was for the people whose names were on the invitation. Her name wasn’t on the invitation and you didn’t send her one, so she’s not invited. Simple as that.

    Post # 5
    7904 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

    I would say that you regret they cannot attend and that the invitations are not tickets and are therefore nontransferable.

    Post # 7
    51 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    @june2013bride:  I am 5 days away from my big day and people are still calling and asking if they can bring someone!!! At some point, you have to be very blunt and simply say NO! We had to call at least a quarter of our guest list because they wrote people in that were not invited. My question is, have these people not ever been to a wedding before??? Who does that??? We are having a plated served meal and a cash bar. So we have extended verbal invites for after dinner to a few people who said they wanted to come. I am flattered that so many people want to be a part of our day, but they have no idea how expensive it is to add even 1 extra person.    

    So my advice to you is, keep your head up, and stand firm. My standard answer was, “we would really love for you to be able to bring a guest, however, do to budget and space restrictions; that is not going to be possible. Thanks for understanding!” 😉 Good luck and don’t stress, this is your day, enjoy it!!!

    Post # 8
    4524 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    @june2013bride:  Exactly what you said should suffice: “i’m sorry you cannot attend. Unfortunately, we can not/will not be substituting guests.”


    Also, I would not have let the cousin adding his Girlfriend fly: you didnt invite him with a guest, it is incredibly tacky to just add one on.

    Post # 9
    1022 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    @june2013bride:  if you extend an invite, In My Humble Opinion even if you are inviting person A I’d say they have the right to give their invite to someone else…? I’m not sure how I’d feel about that.

    Post # 10
    5192 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: February 2013

    @june2013bride:  We’ll find out soon. I have a feeling it’s not just going to be dates, but a plethora of kids (some with dates) as well! Hey, they’re welcome to show up but they’ll have to stand and watch everyone else eat. 

    Post # 11
    297 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    Yep, I’ve already had a few friends (who have no SO’s to speak of, not even close) have made comments about who they are going to bring to the wedding. As in their friends. Even though I only addressed everything to them individually.

    But I just decided, hey, these are my friends, I want them to have fun at my lil shindig so to hell with it! You only get married once. So I let it go.

    However it would be different if someone just showed up without letting me know, I would hate not to have a setting for them.

    The topic ‘Guests inviting other guests’ is closed to new replies.

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