(Closed) Friends/family inviting themselves

posted 8 years ago in Intercultural
Post # 3
242 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

@stressedbride2be: I would suggest spreading the word that the venue is limited and you’ve had to cap the number of guests.  Since my family is from that culture, I could fully attest to what you’re experiencing.  We’re having a destination wedding to escape some of the same hassles.  Are you having it in Trinidad?


Best of luck hon!  

Post # 4
38 posts
  • Wedding: July 2011

I am also from the West Indian culture…this goes back to (Americans struggle with this) not having telephones. I still remember my grandparents house with 1 phone in the hall and 1 in grandads study…people just pass by because that is what their parents did and grandparents before that…it’s cultural. My solution ( we are having just 75 ppl) is to ask a relative back home to host a fete for us when we visit…that way everyone feels they are included and they can see us later. As your marriage goes on you will learn to love the warmth and laid back nature of our people…the hospitality his family and friends are expecting is a natural part of who we are. Everyone is always ready for company…and company usually happens…lack of many American style entertainments (or at least having to WAIT till someone ships it in a barrel) means that ppl entertain themselves with music, dancing, drinking rum etc and yes CHATTING (mamaguise). A fete at home should resolve everything ESPECIALLY if it is presented as “we don’t want people to spend a whole set of money going to the States so we are having something for them here …we HAVE NOT set a date for it yet but we goin’ do it fo sure” If folks back home think that you are trying to help them..they will respond with kindness and understanding. And with no specific date…could be a year, two years…we are notoriously late for everything.

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