Guests paying for transport – yay or nay?

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: ?
    Yes, it's okay to ask them to pay for their trip : (24 votes)
    48 %
    No, it's rude : (26 votes)
    52 %
  • Post # 3
    4439 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: January 2013 - Harbourfront Grand Hall

    @MrsCreeToBe:  Why can’t they stay near the venue?  Honestly,

    I think if you’re broaching the subject of the party bus you need to be paying for it.

    Tough spot to be in…

    Post # 4
    831 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    I’m confused – Why are they staying in Manhattan if your wedding is on LI (I assume), and they presumably are coming in from out of the country for your wedding?


    Post # 5
    3569 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    I don’t think you guys should outright ask them. If you cannot squeeze it in your budget. Then have someone like his parents organize his overseas guest and be in charge of the bus.

    We also have a lot of oot guest and are paying a lot for transportion day off, and two shuttles to the airport. In the end Fi wants to save our guest esp his who are all from oot extra money. But if it doesn’t fit in your budget I think the best option is giving them the information, if needed booking it for them if his parents aren’t from here either. But you still let them be in “charge” of it, even if technically you guys will be booking it and dealing with the vendor.

    I personally wouldn’t be offended, but I been surprised by the amount of things people get offended and hurt by on the bee and at other weddings.

    Post # 6
    2440 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: March 2012

    Will it be more reasonable to just charter a bus than get a limo/party bus?  Since the guests are flying from out of the country, I think you should try to cover the cost of transportation.  Hopefully they will stay close to the venue and you won’t have to worry about it.

    Post # 7
    3092 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    @TwoCityBride:  Great idea!  A parent or someone else with some authority can start pooling up money from folks to get the transport arranged.  Maybe you can contribute just for good measure ๐Ÿ™‚

    Post # 8
    10589 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: January 2011

    My Out of Town guests who flew in rented a car/carpooled with people who rented a car.

    I think if you rent a bus you need to pay for it.


    Post # 9
    1068 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: January 2013

    I agree with PP’s… why the heck are they choosing to stay 1.5 hours away from your venue??? I’ve traveled for weddings before. I rented a car, and I stayed at a hotel near the venue. I don’t think it’s your responsibility to worry about this. It probably would be tacky to ask them to pay for it, but I just wouldn’t broach the subject at all, personally.

    Post # 10
    864 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    They should stay by the venue and not expect you to transport them if they choose to stay far away. That is silly.

    Post # 11
    1092 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    If I was traveling to another country for a wedding it’s my responsibility to get myself to the venue. I’d rent a car or arrange with other guests for a car service and share the cost. If the bride and groom provide transport I’d take advantage of it but it’s not something I’d expect them to pay for. I mean they’re not paying for my hotel, my airfare or attire.

    Could you pay for part of the transportation cost? Perhaps half and your guests the other half? If not your guests should stay at a hotel closer to the venue.

    Post # 12
    14660 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    If you don’t want to or can’t pay for it, just let them figure it out.  If you are offering an option, I think you should pay, not ask them to pay you for your offered bus.

    Post # 13
    2192 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    @Tangled:  I agree.


    Unless they are all underage children than the understanding is they will get themselves to the venue.  In reality your FI’s parents will step up and help out those who need to but you should not be the one worrying about this.

    Post # 14
    95 posts
    Worker bee

    For our wedding we rented a bus for our foreign guests. Most of them were not confortable with driving in a foreign country, and public transportation was not an option. 

    I agree that it is a little awkward to ask them to pay.. but perhaps you could talk to your future in laws and ask them to suggest the bus option to the other guests as if it was your in laws’ idea. Say, your Mother-In-Law could call people and say “hey guys we are figuring out transportation and thinkint to rent a bus. Cost is $24 per person, are you interested?”. This way, you don’t really have to ask for money and probably most of your guests will like this option anyway (better than public transportation when you are all dressed up IMO).

    Post # 15
    205 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    Okay don’t laugh at me, but did you look into the possibility of renting a school bus? That’s what we’re doing for our wedding and it’s way more affordable than a coach bus. They’re charging us $50 an hour for any number of trips to anywhere we need to go. It may be cheesy, but I think it fits in with our zoo wedding (our guests will be riding a train when they get to the venue, so I figured why not throw in a school bus as well) Just an idea!

    Post # 16
    10453 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: February 2014

    For $24 a person, I don’t think it’s a big deal to ask them. I’m not sure why they are staying so far away from the venue so they must have realized this would be an issue when booking their hotel? 

    I had a friend who had a wedding in the middle of nowhere and they got a ‘party camp’ of trailers set up in the farmyard and if people wanted to stay they paid $20/pp/night or something. Nobody complained and people actually liked the idea so they didn’t have to drive 1.5 hours from the nearest suitable town with a decent hotel. 

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