Post # 1
My little rant in the wedding world today…
I was at a wedding 2 weeks ago where 25 (YES TWENTY-FIVE) guests that RSVP’d yes DID NOT come to the dinner reception.. and without any sort of warning. Just didn’t show up. $600 down the drain for the bride’s parents (since they paid for the food… and most of the wedding, actually).
Do people REALLY not realize that the food that is on that plate at weddings COST MONEY??!! And that the plate that wasn’t served, STILL has to be paid for?? Of course, if there was some sort of accident, death in the family, disaster, work-related emergency, something that prevented you from attending, then all should be forgiven. But if you just decided to not come for no apparent emergency reason, why did you RSVP yes in the first place??
I’m hoping that those people, out of plain courtesy, sent or will be sending a card with presentation, in apologies for not showing up and wasting that money.
…I’m now dreading that this will happen at my wedding, since it’ll be Christmas party season.
Post # 3
I was pretty ticked off that quite a few people also didnt show up at my wedding and I had other people who wanted to come even at the very last minute and these stupid people kpe insisting that they would definitely be there and then did not show
Post # 4
Sadly this does happen and it’s the BIGGEST annoyance of ALL things wedding-related IMO. We had 7 couples RSVP YES and then not show. I don’t know if it was because of the holiday or what. A few had reasonable excuses, but this was an $850 loss for us (which, we could’ve put towards a better photographer). It makes it hard not to have hard feelings towards those people that didn’t even contact us to apologize and/or even send a gift/card. I would recommend that you anticipate a few no shows and even to cut your list down a bit so you don’t pay for those meals. Good Luck!
Post # 5
Yes, I had one couple RSVP yes and then no-show. I was PISSED. It was not a reasonable excuse, either – “Oh, I forgot about it when I scheduled my research trip…” WTF?! Oh yeah, and no card, no nothing. I have to wonder if this is because it’s the husband that we knew, not the wife. I somehow have the feeling that she wouldn’t have been so careless.
Post # 6
the same thing happened to me. 20 ppl rsvp yes and then didnt show up. I was super upset about it but Darling Husband said it best “try not to worry about them. the ppl that were most important and cared about us most were there!” i was upset about losing the money etc…. but in the end there was nothing I can do about it. Just focus on whats most important!
Post # 7
Keep a guest list to family and friends! You know their situations and personalities, so you can better plan and recover should someone not make it. Once you get out into the aquaintence world , it gets dicey!
Post # 8
That sucks :-/ Understandbly sh** happens and things come up. But if I’m on the fence about anything, I usually just politely decline. Good thing for us, we’re doing buffet and just getting food for 300 people. And we may possibly be eating BBQ for the week after!
Post # 9
I understand how this could be annoying but things happen. I rsvpd yes to my cousins wedding and was not able to make due to my mom moving to South Carolina when she was my ride. I could not afford to fly up or even drive up. Sorry you are so annoyed by this but maybe something came up last minute.
Post # 10
@nhanvey: Yeah, but unless what came up was that they’re lying in a hospital bed with amnesia and broken fingers, they should DEFINITELY call and let the hosts know BEFORE the wedding. Even if it’s short notice, it’s still infinitely more polite and respectful than just not showing up.
Post # 11
@nhanvey: Did your mum move to S. Caroline on the day of the wedding? If not, you probably had enough time to call and tell the bride that you were not going to come. I hated when my guests did it. And a couple of them were family members who KNEW they weren’t going to come even though the wedding was 20mins from their house. I haven’t gotten a phone call or anything from them either 🙁
Post # 12
I am still furious with my husband’s uncle. They live far enough away that they had to fly to the wedding, rsvped yes for 3 (their 5 year old was one of hte only children we invited, since we figured they wouldn’t come otherwise…the venue had no children’s meal, so we were paying for an adult meal for him). We found out 3 days before the wedding, after the final count was already in, that they weren’t coming. I was so mad. Not only did it cost me 3 meals, but that 3 was enough to have to add an extra table, and therefore a centerpiece. I ended up having to redo my seating chart 3 days before the wedding, and we had an extra centerpiece that cost $250 and was just on the gift table. I honestly do not know how I am going to deal with seeing this family at the holidays. And of course, they didn’t send even a card to congratulate us, never mind a gift.
Post # 13
Feel bad for anyone else that this has happened to, but I guess there’s always gotta be one person in a guest list that will just not show up…
@nhanvey: Like said, if its an emergency and there’s nothing that can be done, then at least have the courtesy to let the bride, groom or their family know, and then if its after the final count, send a card with apologies. I absolutely know what it means for things to come up. My Fiance is a farmer and like we say, “Gotta make hay when the sun shines.” But we always make sure to let the hosts know if he can’t make it, and then reimburse them afterwards.