Post # 1
Sooooo my friend (referred to as S), who is one of my bridesmaids, broke up with her girlfriend (G) of six years last September. She told me it was mutual (they were moving to separate cities anyway), and I believed her, especially since their relationship had been tepid for a long time.
Fast-forward eight months, and it’s S’s birthday. We’re invited to Philly to have drinks and then get sushi. I show up and G is there, which is great cause I haven’t seen her in forever. We start catching up, and lo and behold…S is dating someone new (which I knew) and G is REALLY UPSET (which I did not know).
S is obviously coming to my wedding. My fiance and I wanted to invite G…but now I am unsure if I should, given that the birthday celebration turned into her crying in the bathroom with me comforting her!
The wedding is a year away, but still. Any thoughts? Anything about inviting guests who are exes?
Post # 3
I’m inviting 3 couples who have broken up (2 within the year, 1 that was well over 4 years ago). I spoke with all the girls (who are my friends) and my Fiance spoke with all the boys (his friends). Everyone was super understanding and were prepared that their ex would be attending the wedding.
If you and Fiance want G there, you should definitely invite her. Now that G is aware S is dating again, she will be prepared beforehand and have already braced herself to see S and her new girlfriend. And, I’m sure G will put aside those feelings to make sure you and Fiance have a wonderful wedding.
Just speak to them both and let them know you are inviting them. I also made an exception to the “no plus one” rule for split up couples. It sucks to be newly single, going to a wedding and seeing your ex there. If you can bring a friend or a new date along, it helps.
Post # 4
- Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort
I would invite G and let her decide for herself if she is comfortable coming. She must know S is coming, so if she is uncomfortable going, she can RSVP no. It’s really not your job to make those decisions for her. If you would invite her regardless of this break-up situation, you should invite her despite it. And don’t worry about being drawn into the drama on your wedding day. You will not have a minute to even notice if G is having issues. The only advice I have about mitigating any problems would be to not sit S and G at the same table if things are still rocky a year from now.
Post # 5