(Closed) Guests who didn't give a wedding gift??

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
1471 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

we had one who did not give card or a gift so we did not send a thank you card.  we did send a thank you card to on of my husband close coworkers who could not make it who gave us a card, but other then that we did not send any thank you cards to people who just gaves us cards….

Post # 4
2105 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I’d send a card and thank them for attending the wedding and celebrating the occasion with you.

Post # 6
1132 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I would send thank you cards to anyone who attended, honestly. People spend more time and money than you would think to attend your wedding. People also send gifts a little bit later down the road, or have ordered them from a registry so something might be on its way. Regardless, it is an honor to have people take time out of their day to celebrate with you, so I would thank them for that at the very least, especially if they took time to get a thoughtful card.

Post # 8
671 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@MadameTussaud:  Exactly! gifts are not mandatory. Sure, it is nice to give one, and nice to recieve one, but really! You invite your guest to come and celebrate and be a witness to your marriage–I think gifts are really just a bonus. I’d send a card and thank them for being part of your day.

Post # 10
3471 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - The Gables Inn, Santa Rosa, CA

Yes, you send them a thank you card for attending the wedding, something along the lines of: 


John & Diane, 

It was so wonderful to see you at the wedding. Paul and I were so happy you could share in our day; we have so many wonderful memories! Once we are a bit more settled, we should get together for dinner or something soon. 

All the best, 

Paul & Mary 

Post # 11
416 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I agree with pp to send everyone who attended a thank you card. You never know what going on in peoples lives and they possibly might just send you one later.

Btw congrats ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 12
3618 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

We had guests like that (no card, or card and no gift). We thanked everyone at the very least for “sharing this special day with us”. We didn’t mean it to be like a nudge nudge *ahem* where’s our gift. But one of our friends got the thank you card and was confused why we didn’t thank them for their gift. So she asked her Darling Husband and he thought she had given us the gift. LOL So they were rather embarassed and gave us a gift and apologized, which then made me and Darling Husband feel horribly awkward. We didn’t send it with the intention of pulling gifts out of people. We just wanted to thank everyone for coming. For the record, we didn’t register so we weren’t expecting gifts either.

Post # 14
1101 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

@MadameTussaud:  Agree.

No gift, no card…no problem. Would you have liked a card? Yes. But atleast they attended the wedding. And you should send a simple thank you note for that.

Post # 16
4583 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

If I recall correctly, the only guests who didn’t bring a gift were the younger single guys, so I wasn’t terribly offended by their cluelessness. ๐Ÿ™‚ I didn’t send thank you’s if there was no gift, which I believe is generally considered acceptable. We thanked all our guests, in person, for coming to the wedding. 

It’s also possible that some guests are having a gift sent to you.

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