(Closed) Guns in the house, issue with husband's judgement!

posted 4 years ago in Relationships
Post # 46
1169 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

I’m so glad I’m not American.  I have dust under my bed that I’ve been thinking I should get rid of lately.

Post # 47
56 posts
Worker bee

pinkpolish LOL “different parenting styles”

Mind. Blown.

I’m just gonna leave this here: One Week in April, Four Toddlers Shot and Killed Themselves

via New York Times

Post # 48
402 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

pinkpolish :  as someone growing up in the middle of nowhere I understand the need for guns or even just as a basic right however it is completely completely insane to me that someone would have a loaded shotgun underneath the bed with a crawling baby around??? WTF really???

We have guns I love my guns and so does my husband. However we practice responsible gun safety we do not keep loaded guns we both know how to use all of the guns and they are all kept clean and in a safe place. Not all of them are locked away however they are childproof for now. If we did have children growing up in the house or even visiting our bedroom door where are guns are kept is kept locked. I would completely freak out however this probably wouldn’t be the best option to resolve the issue. Instead of trying to explain to him how you feel and trying to get him to see your side why don’t you just tell him that the gun needs to be Out Of Reach of the baby unloaded and kept in a safe place.

But since you live in the house to you could do this and you should know how to use all the guns in your own house.

ETA I also think it’s Overkill to remove the baby from the room while moving the shotgun assuming that the person moving the shotgun knows not to swing the Barrel near the baby. Come on!

Post # 49
7898 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

I agree the guns need to be stored more carefully especially with a baby living in the house. There are special bedside gun safes if he wants to keep it for self defense. Perhaps you could also have an early detection system (e. g. dog or house security system) to allot the extra time it takes to open the safe.

Darling Husband is also a gun nut/enthusiast, and when we have kids, Darling Husband has said we are getting a gun safe for the firearms. 

Post # 50
1066 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

We have guns. Never loaded though! All of FI’s guns are the gun safe except one which is unloaded and on FI’s side of the bed between the bed and wall where he can access (and load it if need be) fast. Even that makes me uncomfortable but he is very responsible. Our bedroom door is also always locked and the safe is locked in our room. If he had a loaded gun in the house (out of the safe) I’d seriously stay elsewhere until he had it under control to my liking. Our kids are 3, 5, and 8. There’s just no way!

Post # 51
1006 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2016

This thread and the OP make me sick. 

Post # 52
1261 posts
Bumble bee

pinkpolish :  This is really scary. A loaded gun should NEVER be near a baby. We’ve all seen the horror stories. I don’t want you or anyone else to become one. Please unload the gun, take your child far away, and get a LOCKED box for the gun right now.

This is NOT a time for “discussions.” Gun. Locked away. Now.

Post # 53
10649 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2011

We don’t keep guns so I’m not familiar with the law but I don’t even think that would be considered legal here.  I believe guns have to be kept stored in a locked container/area.

They certainly can’t be left loaded.

Post # 54
5158 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 2010

dreambigsleeplate :  It is pretty sad when children  end up having to accept their parents’ Darwin Awards on their behalf.  Of course there are people out there who would say the toddlers should have been taught better – forgetting they are toddlers.

I am in Canada but recall my rural family members, including my father, having rifles around as a child. Even have memories of them having to run out to shoot a bear or two to protect the livestock. I ALSO recall them having those rifles locked up and unaccessible to the children, as well as unloaded (and it not being possible for kids to get the ammo either).

I do not believe everyone needs to or has a right to own a gun. At all. And I believe this even more so after having plenty of military experience with guns, rifles, and other weapons. But JFC, if you are going to have a gun keeping it unlocked, loaded and under the bed is one of the stupidest and most irresponsible things I have heard even BEFORE adding the fact you have children in the house. 


Post # 55
2330 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

Shoot4theMoon :  I also agree that being pissed over not getting the baby out of the room is overkill.

But that gun definitely needs to be locked up away from the baby. 

I’m an officer and have guns spread out hidden around the house. I’m also pregnant. You better believe the guns will be locked in the safe by the time I am due. I already have the safe upstairs and I’ll have one downstairs for quick access. But there will be no guns in sight. 

Better safe than sorry.

Post # 56
313 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

OP I just wanted to come say that I’m impressed with your replies and that you and your husband seem to be handling this situatuon properly at this point. I’m happy you both agree to lock the gun away. I think I would have been upset with moving the gun at that point in time as well, but I’m hoping by now the gun is moved and everything is safe and sound. And that is all that matters. 🙂

Post # 57
1184 posts
Bumble bee

(Disclaimer – I’m completely against open owning if guns and very pro-gun control).

if he’s going to own guns then keeps them locked away. How many accidents need to happen with poor gun safety?

The idea that ‘I’m careful’ and ‘it won’t happen to me’ is just  complacency in my mind. Maybe you need to shock your husband and just ask him how he’d feel if your curious (then) toddler got their hands on it and shot themselves or you.

Kudos to you for raising this with him. If he doesn’t see sense then I’d struggle to view in him the same light. 

Post # 58
1589 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

pinkpolish :  I’m sure this will sound like an overreaction to Bees who have grown up around guns, but honestly, my reaction would be to pick up my child, pack my bags and tell husband I’ll see him when he has the gun locked in a safe with the bullets removed. I also don’t think it’s a great idea to be relocating the gun with the baby in the room. 

This is something you wouldn’t be considering as parents of a baby, and hopefully you’ll never ever face this issue, but from my experience suffering from untreated depression and OCD as a teenager, I think it’s best if children don’t even know where in the house weapons are kept. I’ve attempted suicide three times, and I can tell you that if I’d had access to a gun rather than pills, knives and broken glass, I would not be sitting here typing this post. Obviously I survived and my life is now worth living, but young people with mental illness (or even non-mentally ill adolescents living with bullying or other issues) often can’t see a way out. The idea of a teenager knowing exactly which cupboard the gun’s in and where the key is kept just freaks me right out.

Post # 60
21 posts
  • Wedding: September 2018

Why is this only your husband’s responsibility?  You’re perfectly capable of going out and buying a safe yourself if he doesn’t. 

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