Guy friend confessed his love to me after my engagement party!!!!!!!!!!

posted 2 years ago in Emotional
Post # 31
260 posts
Helper bee

Old bee here. I wouldn’t over-dramatize it. If you don’t have feelings for your friend there is no threat to your fiancée so why upset him by telling him and making it a bigger deal than it is. I also would tell your friend that to go forward in a friendship, he needs to understand that you adore him as a friend but nothing more and there won’t be anymore discussion of his feelings. He likely will distance himself from you and that may be that.  I have had a couple of male friends voice feelings over the course of my life. I have told them that I was flattered (to protect their egos and feelings) but very much taken and it never came up again. And I still have (and treasure) those friendships. 

Post # 32
1234 posts
Bumble bee

I wouldn’t tell fiancé if I were you. What would that achieve? Just like Bill telling you about his feelings, it’s not achieving anything other than causing drama.

you should handle the situation yourself like an adult without involving the fiancé. 

I would distance from Bill, only see him at group gatherings, be polite but not overly familiar or close. Definitely stop the one on one texting as well. 

Two of my guy friends (one in particular used to be a close friend) had asked me out back when I was single and we went on a few dates and it went nowhere. I’m still friends with them and fiancé knows we’ve had this “history”, he jokes we have an incestuous friend group (because one other girl had went on a few dates with one of the two guy friends lol), but it’s so long ago and before his time, he doesn’t mind at all. But I wouldn’t keep in close one on one contact with these two friends. Hang out as a group, sure, but no ongoing texting or one on one “dates”.

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