Post # 47
@anonabee1123: That’s just boys being boys and you should not take it to heart. Judge a man on his actions, as actions speak far louder than words. Plenty of guys who never talk like that cheat. Most boys do talk like your fiancé did, and yet remain sweet, dutiful, and loyal. I’d rather have a man whose good actions make up for his naughty mouth. 🙂
Post # 48
I overheard SO sitting in his car arguing with his friend about his friend’s bachelor party. So was the best man. I was upstairs and SO’s side of the convo drifted up to the second floor so I could hear what he was saying. Basically, SO was trying to talk the groom into having the bachelor party at a casino, not a strip club. He said he doesn’t want to go to a strip club, argued back and forth. Then he said, “No, no, no. You don’t get it. It’s not that I don’t want (me) to catch me at a strip club, I just don’t want to go to one.” Then he said, “I’m not gonna tell her that, especially since I don’t wanna go to one anyway.” It ticked me off that his friend, who is supposed to be my friend too, was trying to tell SO to lie to me. Jerk!
Another thing I didn’t actually overhear (a mutual friend told me for some reason, years after the fact), was that my SO said our good friend from when we were 16 was hott. Yes, she is, but I didn’t wanna hear that! Apparently, before SO and I got together, SO commented that my friend was hott. Then, he said I was hott too. I think my friend thought I’d be pleased that SO thought I was hott, but it had the opposite effect. I was a little bummed that he had said my friend was hott, even though it’s true.
Post # 49
According to my Fiance ALL MEN DO THIS!!!! Married, single, whatever… It is just guy talk. The issue is only when a man acts on it. Don’t worry about it too much!
Post # 50
Sorry to correct you so far removed from the original comment, but it was actually Stephanie Tanner. 😉
OP, ugh. I overhear gross stuff from my Fiance all the time. Never about other women, though. Just…gross stuff.
Post # 51
Dont stress about it. depending on the time of the ahem month, comments like this can give me a short surge of rage and SO says Im scary lol! That said, he doesnt make a habit of it and normally I just roll my eyes and forget it.
He reacts exactly the same so for us its nothing.
Honestly, though, we’re all human and we all love a good perve on attractive people (which is why theyre called attractive in the first place!)
Its innocent unless someones acting on it in my opinion
Post # 52
@anonabee1123: Hey I know this was a little while ago but I just want to say thanks to you for starting this thread and to all the other Bees who responded – My FH and I had gone through a similar incident recently and it screwed us up for about a week before we were right again.
Sorry you had to go through this OP – I hope everything’s clearer now, and thanks so much other Bees for all your invaluable advice and perspective. 🙂
Post # 53
whew! Yes that photo can make any girl feel better! I think its tough for us girls because there are SO MANY GORGEOUS WOMEN! And they are in our face daily!! There should be more hot men in ads for us ladies 🙂
Post # 54
I can’t decide if I like the front view or the reflection of his ass better…Guess it’s good there are both, don’t have to decide 😉
Post # 55
I’ll just leave this here, for any supernatural fans. Since we’re apparently doing this in this thread. ;D
Post # 56
Yeah I struggle with this as well and thanks to the OP for bringing it up. FI has said some things not meant for me to know and it hurt. I do have a pretty sensitive self esteem though, I know. And IMO, it’s just disrespectful. I don’t like it and never will, but I guess if I’m heterosexual I need to deal, since apparently, that’s how they are wired.
Post # 57
I.. am probably minority here… but I will say that I’m confident my Fiance doesn’t make comments like that. Ever.
He doesn’t appreciate them in people, and he sure as heck wouldn’t say them himself… he treasures the sanctity of our relationship. And I can be completely confident in saying that he only has eyes for me.. and always will only have eyes for me (and I must say…. I feel likewise for him… no one can compare!)
That type of talk is totally inappropriate.. it isn’t ‘boys will be boys’ These are supposed to be MEN and men should have respect for women, and especially the ones they say they love. They need to start controling themselves and realize that it isn’t all about whatever urge they get or what crosses their mind… and start exercising restraint.
This type of thing does go two ways though… how often to women comment on other men(s) and/or their bodies… don’t you think it could effect men as much as these types of comments effect us women when we catch wind of them? Just some food for thought
Post # 58
When I worked in a nursing home an old man used to always tell me how pretty I was, and one day I said “your wife is beautiful! you are going to upset her!”
To which the wife responded, “Honey, I don’t care where he gets his appetite as long as he comes home for dinner.”
That being said, I don’t want my fiance getting hot and bothered looking at other women and then coming home to me. Not saying that at all. However, guy’s have brains that are wired to see tig ole bitties and see fertility. It goes all the way back to the cave man days.
It’s the same thing as us watching Magic Mike more than once just to… erm… make sure we understood the plot. We are hard-wired to see capable male bodies and think it’s attractive.
Your Fiance chose you. He loves YOU and your boobies! He is choosing to wake up beside you and the gals for the rest of his life! All the big chesticles in the world aren’t going to change that.
If it really bothers you still talk to him… or if you ever hear his guy talk again, chime in with how you want to chew on Hugh Jackman’s beard (or whoever else tickles your fancy). Chances are that talk will stop real quick.
Post # 59
@anonabee1123: I think that’s just ‘guy talk’ and he did not intend for you to overhear that. Fiance and I just had a little chat about women’s bodies last night, though! I’ve been exercising more lately and my breasts definitely shrunk a little (of course, these are always the first to go lol) and when Fiance made a comment about it, I made sure that he was aware that men have unrealistic expectations about what a woman’s body should look like. I told him that you can either have larger breasts or abs. It’s pretty hard to maintain both after a certain age ha. Certainly, plastic surgery makes anything possible. But guys need to get it through their heads that’s not what normal women look like!!!