Guys weekend issue

posted 2 weeks ago in Relationships
Post # 16
1577 posts
Bumble bee

All I can add is that from my experience and the stories of others, a lot of men go by this credo (and this is a direct quote from my ex when he was telling me a story about his best friend):

“Deny, deny, deny.”

So they cheat emotionally and/or physically, and then deny it, and continue to deny it. And make up shit to make their partner believe their denials. Unfortunately, many women accept their denials for a myriad of reasons.

I would leave.

Post # 17
9733 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

He’s a liar. But if they were asking for her to come back it makes me think maybe they didn’t progress to actual sex the first time.

I would still dump him.

Post # 18
1697 posts
Bumble bee

Since when do strippers take off their shoes?

Post # 19
42 posts
  • Wedding: May 2020

MargaritaVille :  or forget them and have to come back for them!!! Like she walked out of a hotel room and walked around for a couple of hours (even minutes) without shoes!!!!??? Like none of that makes sense.. even if shoes was a code word, it is a really dumb one! 

Post # 20
585 posts
Busy bee

Is this the same post as  “My fiance went to cancun and said no strippers but then he buddies got some anyways, no whoops they were prostitues and I know some of the guys cheated by not my fiance” ??
Or is this new? 

Post # 21
383 posts
Helper bee

He is a liar and if he hasn’t already physically cheated on you, he is planning to. Leave.

Post # 22
2492 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2017 - Courthouse

Regardless of how anyone feels about strip clubs, it’s shady to hire a private stripper. Especially at a hotel. I don’t have a problem with strip clubs but hiring a stripper to come to a hotel is toeing the line of prostitution. To me, it’s super concerning your Darling Husband would have any part in that. 

I would sit down and ask about it. That’s not okay and the least he could have done is tell you about it. 

Post # 23
672 posts
Busy bee

michelle99 :  

Your husband is a liar. Covering for his friends who are married because they wanted to text the stripper? He must think you were born yesterday. Even if it was true, which I highly doubt, what does it say about him that he would enable his friends to text a stripper behind their wives’ backs?

You are only 6 months in to your marriage and he is already talking about doing another boys’ weekend like this? The man has very little regard for your feelings or respect for you.

Not just that, I urge you to really think about how this situation is making you act. You are snooping through your husband’s text messages. Phoning up the stripper agency pretending to be a client. Doesn’t it disturb you what this is making you do? Doesn’t it tell you something is really wrong here?

I couldn’t personally get past all of this myself. I urge you to do some real soul-searching.

Post # 24
10594 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

michelle99 :  

I would *not* assume that the stripper was being truthful with you about the contact being limited to touching during lap dances.  She is not likely to disclose *everything* to a complete stranger, particularly if prostitution is illegal where you live.  And sex workers have had plenty of experience with wives and gfs going undercover.

Think about it, Bee. This is what you have been reduced to—fake calls to strippers/sex workers.

It requires a massive fortress of denial or extreme naïveté to believe that strippers go to hotel rooms to set firm boundaries on drunken idiots throwing money at them.

Your husband is perfectly comfortable subsidizing an industry that is rife with child and adult trafficking.  

Your situation is worse than the standard Bee bachelor party gone wrong fable in which Prince Charming is the lone holdout in a sea of temptation.  Your husband actively pursued further contact with the smoking hot stripper and/or sex worker.

Unfortunately, this is the husband you’ve got, Bee. It’s up to you whether you can handle a lifetime of this.

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